EQUIPMENT

Major Tee Time Policy Change



Watch as CPG explains the new tee time policy that is to take effect beginning March 1st.

Okay guys thanks for coming in as everyone is well aware ever since the postco golf boom it’s been almost impossible for many of our members here at the club to get a tea time it’s too busy so in order to free up the te- sheet and create a general sense of

Fairness we have created a point system that will allow the more deserving members here at the club the ability to easily get a tea time points will be compiled and awarded based on a simple formula that combines several key metrics meaning that the more points each member of the group has the better

Chance your group has of getting a tea time beginning March 1st points will be awarded as follows if you’re a member of the club or a Groupon member in good standing you get a full point if you’re an annual member a corporate member a junior member or the spouse of a full

Full member you get half a point if you’re the biological child of a full member a Groupon member or a corporate member you get a quarter point and if you’re the friend of a corporate member or the girlfriend of a junior member you get an eighth of a point okay you also

Get a point for each year you’ve been a member minus your index this will allow for the better players with more seniority a chance to get the premium T times now the female members are a little trickier because they historically don’t play as many rounds so they will have the same requirements

As the men but we decided to add points for physical attributes in order to even things out and to promote a healthy lifestyle so each female member has been preassigned an appearance rating from 1 to 10 as well as a body weight component using 130 lb as a baseline mean so for

Example Shelby Clayman is a 6 out of 10 who weighs 142 lbs and has been at the club nine years so nine minus her 28 index is -19 plus six for looks minus 12 for being 12 lbs over the Baseline weight is a total of negative – 25

Points you get the idea so let’s put all this in a real life scenario let’s say hypothetically that Stan Perry wanted to make a time for himself his son Jerry Jerry’s girlfriend Heidi and at the last minute Edna Frank wanted to join okay right out of the gate Stan would get a

Point for being a Groupon member Edna would get a half point for being the spouse of a full member and Jerry would get a quarter point and Heidi would add an eighth of a point for a total of 1.875 points Stan would then take his 22

Years at the club minus his 16 index for six more points making the groups total 7.875 Stan’s son Jerry is a junior member so all of his numbers would be calculated at 50% so 4 – 11 = -7 bringing the group Total down to a

0.875 Heidi is a n out of 10 on looks who carries a 40 index and weighs 8 PBS under the mean weight so since Heidi is technically Stan’s guest we take his 2 2 years of seniority minus her 40 index which is minus 18 then we add nine for

Looks plus eight for weight which makes Heidi’s number -1 bringing the group Total up to a 0.125 and finally we have Edna who’s a 24 index joined the club in 2012 is a two on the loop scale and weighs 177 lb so 12- 24 is -12 plus 2 for looks is -10

Then she gets hit for being 47 lb over the mean weight which comes out to A- 57 bringing the grand total of the group down to a 57125 in other words this particular group has no chance of getting a t okay thanks guys

49 Comments

  1. Pro tip for the members, generously remember your club pro at Christmas, New Years, and throughout the year, especially if you're a meat and potatoes kind of guy/girl. Unless you have the body of a rock climber or Kate Moss in her prime, you ain't playin…

  2. Prove me wrong, but is there not some additional calculus required for "stroke play" from the beverage cart girl? It would seem to me this should impact many slippery tee time situations!

  3. When Heidi turns 32, I’m hoping CPG has protections in place for her from 50 year old male club members attempting at this time to comply with the “Country Club Rule”.

  4. Rock in roll 🤠 Time to go back math class 👍 get a teatime has nothing to do with golf score 🤣🌭🌽🤔

  5. So much common sense built into this, and utilizing numbers and math can never go wrong. My only question would be how do you handle your transgender members (i.e. Jill) on the points scale. Seems like she (he?) would be severely penalized on the weight factor.

  6. What about money spent in the pro shop? For every “benchmark” purchase you gain a certain amount of points. Just saying, cash is king and Edna looks a whole lot better with a shiny new complete set of PXGs she bought in the pro shop.

  7. Going to be an amazing golf season for my foursome CPG thanks for implementing my idea. I’ll be able to lock in for the season my 8am tee time on Saturdays for myself and my 3 waitresses from Hooters mega thanks ⛳️ All The Best! Be Well Be Safe & Stay Blessed.

  8. Any group with a member that looks like that blonde with the low cut red shirt should have a prime tee time. What’s wrong with you?

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