It’s getting late George aren’t you about ready to turn in yes I certainly am but I think I’ll have a little snack first why don’t you skip it tonight darling you know what Hazel says about your calories well for your information Hazel has sent her last words to me
About calories oh after you left for the show with dedre I had it out with her I told her I was sick and tired of hearing her talk about my weight problem so I made her a promise never to say another word about it to me again wow I’ve never
Known Hazel to break a promise that’s exactly what I’m counting on shall we see what’s in the Refrigerator what’s this a recent medical survey reveals that overweight shortens the human lifespan so you’ve never known her to break a promise huh she didn’t say Anything George [Applause] there’s some delicious low calorie chocolate pudding on second Shelf Dorothy you remember when you decorated my house you warn me about that corner of my living room yeah and you should have taken your advice Miss BN it’s like going to the doctor and then not taking medicine because it has a bad taste no I didn’t mean that I know what you mean
Hazo and I agree with you well if you don’t care for a love seed in that difficult Corner how about a desk if you could find me a wonderful old antique desk I’d love it I know just the desk have you been in the Peabody Mansion
About 35 Mi south of town well old Mr Peabody left a fabulous collection of antiques and the Estates being liquidated hot dog they got a desk for Miss Bowen it is the most beautiful elegant little French desk you’ve ever seen it looks like a table but it has
Drawers it’s really a desk tell me I went to the house last week and oh it’s an Aladdin’s cave I’ve never seen such fabulous treasure say do they have a paper we with a snowstorm in It [Applause] [Applause] hi Mr Bee I heard you drive up evening Hazel here’s a salad oil you ask me to get thanks Miss be’s in there chining with Miss Baldwin thank you hello dear hi Peggy hi darling George do you know you have the most wonderful wife in the
World I certainly do every day and every way she’s getting better and better oh I don’t mean that when she was decorating the house she kept saying that’s what you need in that corner that’s exactly what that corner needs oh not your corner our Corner
Oh you’ve been in our house you know the corner it’s the corner right after you turn the corner from the other room oh that one for a moment I didn’t know what you’re talking about I’ll go tomorrow and make the offer oh I wish I could go
With you but tomorrow’s my Red Cross day promise me though if anyone makes a higher offer you’ll out bid them bid don’t you worry Peggy that desk is yours I can hardly wait till you see it it’s positively ancient it’s covered with wormholes and has those lovely Bode legs
Well you look at that desk you say that’s Peggy Baldwin oh why influence Hazel or does she influence me hazel I have to talk to you oh hi Mr be say you don’t look so good I better fix something Bland for your dinner if your stomach’s acting up it’s
Not my stomach that’s acting up it’s my wife you know what she’s going to do tomorrow she’s going to buy a desk yeah I know Hazel she’s going to buy that desk at an auction an auction are you sure well where else do they make bids
And you know what happens every time she goes in one of those things sure I do she comes home with a whole bunch of stuff I have to dust polish and glue together she’s been like that ever since she was a little girl there’s something about auctions that makes her lose all
Her marbles don’t tell me I know she buys up everything with the auctioneer’s gavel no you’re wrong there Mr be we got the gavel and don’t make a bad Nutcracker though you know if I was you I’d go with her so she won’t buy a whole
Lot more junk oh no you ought to go with her tomorrow to keep her from buying a lot of junk why me well because I’m in the finals of the bridge tournament at the club besides if I go with her she might talk me into something oh Mr B
You’re asking me to poke my nose into something that ain’t none of my business now when has that bothered you before for somebody that wants a favor you ain’t being too diplomatic now for someone who’s going to have to wash it and polish it and glue it together
You’re not being you talk me into it Mr be when you put it on a practical basis like that how can I refuse now be sure and call me before I leave for the club and let me know what happens it’s a little difficult to relax with something like bankruptcy hanging
Over my head oh Mr [Applause] B now if you’ll just sign here please Mrs Baxter yes now this desk is to go to Mrs Baldwin C here’s the address oh yes thank you I’ll just copy that off on the delivery order oh Hazel isn’t this the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen yeah feel like wormholes I got nothing
To gang them that much less wood to polish can’t you just see her sitting there who Madame pomidor Marie Anette ain’t you the one that lost your head yes oh that reminds me I got a phone call to make Missy I thought this was going to be an auction oh most of these
Pieces are going to a museum a few of the less historical ones are being sold to interior decorators oh here you are Mrs Baxter Mr Burton I know that none of the statuaries for sale but I’d like to look at it why of course it’s around in
Back in the garden thank you excuse me uh is there a phone around here yes just inside the door to the left oh thanks That’s a real pushy piano it’s the last thing we got to L out of here today yeah I think so I’m sure glad to hear that hello you got nothing to worry about cuz it turned out not to be an auction after all yeah I knew you’d be
Pleased she bought a swell wormy desk for Mrs Baldwin and now we’re just about to take off oh oh you’re still out there look on your way back if you pass any of those roadside stands I know selling sweet corn get some you sure like corn Mr be maybe that’s why your jokes
Are oh are we just kidding see you [Applause] Later Hey uh here are the keys would you get the car please oh sure Missy Oh Oh Well now you get that open we’ll be on our way missy now we’re away from the peab body place I can tell you miss Mr B thought it was an auction you know how nuts you go at auctions I had to come along to see you didn’t lose your head
Can’t you get it open I’m trying to open it well a Pete say don’t snap my head off sorry Hazel I’m nervous it must be if you can’t open a simple lock like that here you hold these I’ll open it oh for Pete’s sake this is the front
Door key Hazel did you see that beautiful Rosewood spin at piano yeah it may be a museum piece and it may cost a fortune but it ain’t much on Chopsticks I bought it what you you bought it how much I haven’t the nerve to tell you but it’s being delivered to the
House this afternoon C hey Missy look at me are you telling the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help me well there nothing to be nervous about we just got to be cool calm and Collected Hazel what that’s the key to my Workshop so please stop asking me why I did it I don’t know why I did it I took one look and fell in love with that piano and the next thing I knew I was signing my name and telling them to send it C well maybe we ought to go down the
Corner and turn the streets aren’t around oh that’s a wonderful idea oh forget it you see anything Nope nothing but a beautiful Empty Street boy the suspense is awful like one of them westons where you look down a deserted Street waiting for the bad men to come shoot up the sheriff I wouldn’t blame George if he shot me if I were any kind of a loving helpful wife
I’ sh shoot myself all you got to do is to cross your fingers and pray that the truck breaks down and I got to cross my fingers and pray that Mr be makes Grand Slams all afternoon doubled redoubled and vulnerable I wonder which would be
Better for George to walk in and see the piano or for George to be here when the piano walks in oh there’s nothing to worry about all we got to do is to convince Mr be that he wants a Pian before he knows he’s got one Hazel do
You have a plan well but we better think up one pretty soon I here Mr to be at the front door George darling it’s you well yes Mr B how many Grand slimes did you make this afternoon I played the worst game of bridge of my life and I don’t wish to discuss
It the only bit of luck I did have today was sending Hazel along with you to that auction she told me on the phone you weren’t bringing anything home and that’s the absolute truth we didn’t bring a thing home it wasn’t even an auction I [Applause] Know Dorothy what are you doing rearranging the furniture oh not again well George the only reason I keep rearranging the furniture is because I keep trying to find some kind of solution solution to what this wall it’s so bare well George look you can see for
Yourself how bare it is well of course it’s bare you just moved the chair away from it just is right for this wall what it requires is is something about twice as wide well a piano’s about twice as wide George why didn’t I think of it
Hazel did you hear what he said a piano of course that’s the very thing if you don’t mind I prefer the chair I can’t sleep on a piano George the chair simply isn’t low enough it requires something this height and and your idea about a piano was inspiration now just a minute
We had a piano here when we first moved in remember a grand piano but you said it made the furniture look too small so we got rid of it another piano is the last thing we’re going to get for this house truck coming a truck it’s a laundry
Truck it’s a laundry truck what were you expecting a piano [Laughter] Hazel will you please take another look and see if there’s any side of that truck coming nope how do you like that them fellas are sure taking their time for heaven sakes that’s the one thing we have to be thankful for I know I know but if we get things straightened out
Before they get here I’m sure going to let them have it out of the mouths of Babes oh how don’t you think it’s about time you started taking music lessons I didn’t know why why well if you’re going to learn to play an instrument you got to start taking music lessons early right Mr B what are you talking about Harold’s music lessons what music
Lessons well the music lessons he ought to be taken right away you know you got a terrific ear for music Mr be well thank you hael and since Harold inherits it straight down from you it would be a shame for him not to start taking music lessons right away well I suppose how
Old were you when you started Mr B oh about Harold’s age oh yeah well uh what do you think we ought to do first gam an instrument well I think a thing like that should be left up to the child how do you feel about it son you really want
To learn sure I do if you did oh I certainly did I wanted to be the greatest musician that ever lived then so do I I want to be exactly like you thank you [Applause] son uh darling uh we were just talking about Harold starting to study music do you think he’s too young no I’m not not if you did it oh I think it’s a wonderful idea now I don’t want to force you into anything because if I did that you’d
Learn to hate music and that’s the last thing in the world I’d want when can I start the sooner the better Harold if if you’re going to be like your dad we got to get you a piano right away right Mr be no I didn’t study
The piano I studied the violin the next what I want to study H wouldn’t you rather study the piano it sounds better not if dead studi the Rin but how violins is so expensive I read the other day where a famous violinist paid $25,000 for an old
Secondhand one now you wouldn’t want to put your dad in the poor house would you well he doesn’t have to have a Strat of various but suppose you get it and then it turns out you don’t like to play the fil you spend all that money for nothing
And you won’t even have something you could put the family pictures on the violin won’t cost a scent I still have my old one where is it up in the attic oh boy can we go get it sure thing son I race you up the stairs Hazel how could I buy anything so
Expensive without consulting George he wouldn’t buy a car without consulting me or a suit or E even a tie and I have to buy a piano don’t move if we don’t answer it maybe they’ll go away opportunity only knocks once but a piano mve keeps right on ringing we
Don’t answer it George is going to hear it I got had an Idea you stick on a doorbell I’ll see if I can Rouse somebody around [Laughter] back you’re looking for the backers that’s right they moved they didn’t leave no floor with in the [Laughter] Dress we we’ve got your piano for you Mrs Baxter and if you don’t mind we’re in a hurry we got to deliver a desk over to Mrs Baldwin it’s uh Cod I know Missy he put his finger right on it on what if there’s one thing Miss Bowen’s nutty
About it’s antiques don’t you think she’d like a little oldfashioned music wait right here Buster really darthy it sounds Divine I have always wanted an antique Rosewood spin it oh but I could deprive you of it he you don’t understand I want you to deprive me of it I got kind a crazy
Impulse George finds out things are going to get pretty noisy around here well in that case why don’t you just have the men delivered here with the desk oh Peggy that’s the nicest thing anybody’s ever said to me she going to take it pH oh thank you thank you I’ll
Be looking for the men and I can’t wait to see it bye darthy Phil guess what darthy has found us most priceless Treasure of a piano a piano a Rosewood spin it at least 150 years so isn’t that fantastic yes fantastic that’s a good word for it have
You taken a look at our bank balance lately I no well I want you to take a good look at it and then I want you to call Dorothy and tell her not to send that piano over here but I’ve already told her I’d take it I I can’t back down
On my word I’ll back down on it for you going over to the backers and get a few things straightened Out ta the residence oh yeah just a minute it’s Mr Bowen maybe we can sell him some more stuff Hello Phil oh oh you don’t want the uh you don’t want the piano but Phil it’s so beautiful and it goes so well with that desk oh you you don’t want the you don’t
Want the desk neither you’re coming over to see George oh boy we’re in real trouble now guess Phil we’ll be looking forward to seeing you those piano movers aren’t going to move a foot until they’re paid maybe I can think of something else to move beside their Feet man that Hazel sure can cook I don’t know understand stand it no reason at all right out of the blue and she puts on a feed like this for us now Phil calm down you don’t want to lose your temper in front of the ladies
I certainly do they’re the reason I lost my temper Mr bwin I remembered how you like avocado dip from the last times so I made some special just for you thank you I’ve always maintained it was bad policy to mix business and friendship but Dorothy macademia your favorite kind
Of nuts Mr B Missy went all the way down to the market to get them just for you she’s always so considerate well thank you dear now Phil a minute I haven’t finished Dorothy did a good job on the house you’re Don toon she’s the best interior decorator in town but she won’t
Stop decorating every time I turn around I’ve got another bill to pay oh now Phil slow down a little bit last night I distinctly remember that Peggy asked Dorothy to get that antique desk that’s right Phil yeah and and Missy never said a thing about the Pea body sale until
She did I just think heard it Hazel please but it was Dorothy’s idea to get the desk in the first place only because that corner of yours is a problem I see in other words I shouldn’t blame anybody I should go home and get into an argument with that corner well the fact
Remains that Peggy asked Dorothy to buy that desk did she ask her to buy the piano too piano what piano haven’t heard about the piano well George I can’t keep from butting in no longer it seems to me you men expect a lot from your wives when you come home
From the office tired you like the house to feel lived in and comfortable like an old shoe and when you bring home a client you expect it to be kind of ritzy but you don’t want to pay nothing for the furniture any wife that can decorate a house like that deserves the Noble
Prize Phil Hazel has put her finger right on your trouble thank you Hazel oh that’s okay you see you’ve allowed Peggy to buy all the house Furnishings because you didn’t want to be bothered with it you’d rather be out playing golf somewhere like you were today oh playing bridge or
Something like that right Mr be that’s right now I think under those circumstances a man should be gracious enough not to complain about what she buys ain’t it the truth now I’m going to have another bit of this cake and we got to get this
Thing in there we don’t want to wear out our welcome no Mr B and Mr Beast just as bad as you are about buying furniture he hates it well I guess I do but I’ll say this for him even though we don’t always agree with what Missy buys he always goes
Along with it and pays the bill without complaining another macadamia nut Mr B well than George you um you make me feel ashamed of [Applause] Myself what’s that Pian your wife bought it at the Peabody sale it’s uh cood F you’ll just make out a [Laughter] check I’ll write you a check for that antique desk it’s worth it to see that expression on your face [Laughter] George what expression I love the piano
Well Dorothy and I discussed it thoroughly today it’s exactly what we need for that bare wall I couldn’t be happier happy dear oh George you’re wonderful there’s only one thing what’s that Hazel well now that we got the new antique piano Don’t It Make all the rest
Of our old stuff look kind of [Applause] New oh Pete S I’ll get it here let me help you there boy these cheap bags they just tear if you breathe on them oh hey rhubarb boy oh boy that sure this takes me back huh oh my mother used to make the greatest R Barb Pie when I was a kid
Of course that’s about 400 years ago uh you make pie out of this oh do I boy the folks that I work for think I invented rubab pie it’s my specialty I’ll bet it send ational say you got quite a load there you got far to walk oh no not far I live
With the backers on Marshall Road well thanks for helping me out with the groceries oh the pleasure is all mine and uh good luck with the pie such a nice little [Applause] Man come [Applause] here yes off still hanging around town huh yeah but I ain’t doing anything I I’m just walking along the sidewalk well watch yourself I don’t want to have to pick you up Again Oh I didn’t expect to see you again did you want something yeah I I don’t mean to impose on our friendship or anything friendship yeah but uh I just couldn’t seem to get that rhubarb pie off my mind it’s got me drooling I ain’t even started it yet I could tell just by
Looking at you that you was born with a natural talent for cooking your Pie’s got to be the greatest oh boy the Blondy just oozes out your ears don’t it oh that’s no Blarney I mean it Mrs Miss Burke heel Burke I’m on it oh thanks I’m Willie cravy and look I’m not
Begging you must have some odd jobs that need doing around here I’ll trade your work for pie fair enough yeah I guess so well go on sit down the robar pie won’t be ready till dinner but I got a little piece of Dutch Apple left from last night the FKS right in there
Oh well so now you tell me anything you want done around here just anything oh anything that needs doing around this house I’ve already done but I got some folks next door that might need somebody uh you know anything about gardening oh sure I’ve been doing a lot
Of gardening around lately let me see there but Hampton Ohio yeah and op porori Illinois I met a real nice family there and I trimmed some hedges in Hatfield New Jersey say you had around don’t you it’s the only way to live I think know the sure is good pie oh well
The r Bob’s going to be even better M now let’s see Burke is b r ke right yeah that’s right what are you doing oh uh I meet a new friend I put him in the book look here I got a lot of friends that
Start with a be there’s been a Dy and Barker and butterf there one that’s just got a first name ba uhhuh well she didn’t have a last name you see bu’s a Jersey cow lives in Duck run IA she loves a friend though a cow are you
Kidding no I slept in a barn one night I woke up hungry and bua gave me a bucket of milk for breakfast well that was a nice friendly J well she didn’t actually give it to me I had to take it away from her of course
Now that was real good say where do these people live the um the Johnson oh they live right next door you know right on this side mhm Hazel have you seen oh I’m sorry I didn’t know you had company oh that’s all right Mr B he was just
Going tell the Johnson that I sent you yeah yeah yeah all right thanks thanks for everything bye goodbye hael uh who was that oh that’s just a little fell looking for oddd jobs his name’s Willie why what’s the matter I’ve seen him someplace I can’t quite Place him though but I have a
Vague feeling he was in some kind of trouble well he’s out of work and he’s hungry I guess that’s enough trouble dog G it where have I seen him before well I don’t know unless you’ve been in Duck R Iowa and happened to know a cow named Baer
Well that was a wonderful dinner Hazel oh good perfect chicken and doublings are just great well I’m glad you like them I’ll get you pie now can I have two pieces of pie Hazel oh sure you can AFF for it but only one at a time did you
Tell your dad how well you did your geography test today well go on tell him yes he had an almost perfect score George we had to name the capitals of all the states and I only missed one South Dakota well good for you that’s just fine do you know the capital of
South Dakota dad me well of course I do I could probably name all of them if we had time but uh we don’t South Dakota that’s the only one I missed Hazel said she bet you wouldn’t know it either oh she did did she well that’s
Ridiculous it’s uh well if of course it is your father knows Pierre is the capital of South Dakota and I’m glad you asked me son Pierre is the capital of South Dakota and remember that the next time he’s smarter than I thought he was was he very well informed
Hey oh is that the buzzer no that’s probably Willie I told him to over for a piece of pie oh no you mean that little Hobo’s hanging around for a handout oh Mr B he’s practically on now he did such a good job for the Johnson that keeping
Him on he’s going to sleep in that garage think I’m telling you that I’ve seen that willly character somewhere before and I can’t figure out where besides I have an uneasy feeling about him I’ve got an uneasy feeling about him too I’m afraid he’ll eat my other piece of
Pie I hope my telephone call didn’t interrupt your work no I was just finishing up the breakfast dishes what’s this important thing you want to show me me see it’s functioning well I’ll be done that clock hasn’t run since I first knew you people what happened will he
Repaired it and now it’s in perfect Order each tick followed by a talk which in turn is followed by another tick thus completing the cycle Mr Johnson do you have a screw drri oh hi Hazel hi Willie I hear you’re a clocksmith along with everything else huh oh that oh that’s
Not much why that clock just needed a good cleaning that’s all you’re entirely too modest Willie yes if it hadn’t been for Willie I’d have missed my reading hour last night I was completely immersed in Plato’s Republic when here let me demonstrate suddenly the lamp went out I remembered everything you would advise
Me to do in such a crisis I checked the cord and it was properly inserted then as you had told me I gave it a resounding whack yes and it didn’t work huh then I sent for willing and he had it working in no time show Hazel how you solved it Willie like
This it was just a loose bulb that’s all and now if I could please have that screwdriver Mr Johnson oh yes yes the uh do we have a screwdriver Harriet oh sure you do in your tool chest I’ll show you Willie come on it’s good to know where our
Screwdriver is isn’t the tool chest yes tomorrow I shall ask you where the tool chest is are you sure that little lamb chop is all you want for lunch it’s all I need I’ve gained half a pound well I guess when I was your age I would have worried
About a half a pound too now it’s just like one extra raindrop in a cloud bir darling H I expect you home for lunch I got a postpone of VAC case and I thought I’d drop by Hazel would you be kind enough to scramble me a couple of
Eggs oh I’ll do even better than that maybe I’ll warm up some of that stew chicken we had for dinner last night oh that sounds great okay Mr V oh Hazel by the way I have some news for you oh what I’ve learned where I’ve seen your friend
Willie before Oh Where in court about a week AG go what was he doing in court the police brought him there when they found a pair of binoculars and a radio on him that had been stolen from a car I don’t believe it are you sure George if
He was arrested why isn’t he in jail because he told a Sab story to a soft-hearted judge and got off of just a warning now when you see the Johnson’s you must tell him that Willie has sticky fingers I’m sure Willie will be able to set all our minds at rest George I’ll
Bring him in now mark my words George Willie was innocent I pride myself on being able to judge character and I trust Willie I hate to shake your faith in human nature Mr Johnson but I was in court when they brought him in don’t worry Mr Johnson will he’s going to come
Out of this smelling like a rose oh hi Hazel oh hi Willie how you doing oh fine uh you want to speak to me Mr Johnson yeah well Willie uh we have a disquieting report uh that is the Willie I want to ask you a question was you
Arrested last week with a radio and a pair of binoculars that didn’t belong to you yeah aren you hear about it oh I got a pipeline in the court Willie tell us what happened well it’s kind of silly makes me look like a chump I guess but like I
Told the judge I thought this fell was all right he seemed honest what fella Frank his name was I met him in a box car yeah he came over to this room I had and brought this radio and these binoculars said he was going out of town
Could I keep them for him mhm and so you kept them for him yeah for about 20 minutes that is and then the police came banging at the door and that was it yeah lucky the judge believed me I guess oh we all believe you Willie sure we do
Willie but you know you just can’t trust everybody you meet in a Box Car well I better get back to work now as soon as I finish cleaning out the basement I’ll get that wall shelf glued together again I so glad you noticed it was cracked Willie yeah it could have
Fell off the wall and busted all the pretty knickknacks you keep on it see you later well George you must admit Willie has a distinct odor of roses about him well now whether you believe that story or not Mr Johnson you better keep an eye
On it oh Mr B you can’t say he’s a crook just cuz he got arrested you got arrested yourself last week for double parking Hazel I got a ticket now that situation was entirely different from Willies well yeah it is different come to think of it you was guilty of your
Crime they not that out a whole l we’ll just let it dry overnight and then hang it up again in the morning now our brick a BRI will be secure uhhuh oh you sure got nice stuff here I’ll bet these cost a lot yeah some of them are quite
Valuable uhhuh oh I like this one best it’s got real class well it’s a favorite of ours too a very dear friend gave it to us mhm it just here on the bottom it was made in Italy it was purchased at the treasure shop here however oh
I’ll bet it’s real valuable yes in the course of time it will become an [Laughter] [Applause] antique hello oh good morning Miss Johnson Willie no I ain’t seen him gone not a sign of them huh oh I want to hear more about this Miss Johnson I’ll be right right over oh just took off without a word huh yes we’ll certainly miss him oh well uh
Speaking of missing is there anything else missing I mean uh is is is Willie the only thing you can find well except for our little flower bowl you remember it Hazel the one Mrs upfield gave us oh yeah the little marble bowl with The Sparrows purged on it
Yes that’s it you see we don’t think it’s gone permanently we we just think that Willie misplaced it that’s all oh well ain’t that a little hot in this place oh not at all you see Willie admired it very much oh he did we feel he was having another look at it and
Carelessly put it down someplace out of sight oh we’ll find it around the house somewhere oh sure sure I wonder where will he could have gone we feel that Willie heard the call of the open road again I’m sure Willie is once more a Carefree Rover traveling along singing a vagabond
Song beautifully expressed her I can’t take credit for the words harri I once heard them sung in a theater by a young man with a megaphone in his mouth ring I believe they called it so it your sophistication whoever will he is our blessings go with him
He’s completely worthy of our trust and I know you must agree oh sure I do Mr Johnson Hazel you mustn’t blame yourself no but I’m the one that sent him over to the Johnson well he didn’t take much well only a bow but he might have taken
The most important thing they got their faith in human beings oh I hope not well there’s only one way to find out do you have an idea Hazel well it ain’t exactly honest but it’s worth trying that bowl comes from the treasure shop now this is what I think I ought to do
Hit if it should prove that Willie did make off with our flower bowl you’d find it quite distressing wouldn’t you oh no doubt it would cause you great concern too my dear yes I’d be most unhappy however we both know that his innocence is beyond question absolutely I believe I’ll take a stroll
In the park Harriet if you don’t mind oh not at all dear in fact I think I’ll I think I’ll go next door and have a chat with Dorothy bter Splendid idea and when we return we’ll discover where will he put it I’m positive we will
A flower bowl in the shape of a bird bath yes yes about a year or so ago I ordered six of them from a dealer oh goody you got any left well uh they were very popular you know quite a choice item but I might be able to help you just one second
Please well this is your lucky day I’ll say how much is is it well I can tell that you value fine things so I’ll make you a special price shall we say $10 why don’t we say five well five is so unlucky can’t we make it nine oh Nine’s
A terrible number for me what about 8 even very well 850 but I’m only doing this because you’re a connoisseur and you appreciate Beauty yes you’ve made an excellent purchase sir this is one of my best pieces oh very kind of you to make me a special price of $10 well we always
Try to favor a connoisseur such as You I can’t tell you how happy I am to get this pleasure is mutual madam there you are and here’s your change oh uh there was no tax involved no it was $12 even a special price for a connoisseur such as you oh thank you let me see you
To the door oh thank you very much all right goodbye Goodbye are your Home Miss Johnson look what I found in your Garage oh dear what a coincidence I just found this in here oh well this is a real one I found it in the garage where Willie must have left it I’m sorry Hazel we Lo the garage as soon as we knew Willie had gone oh you did
MH I guess we both might as well fess up I guess we better I bought this in the treasure shop me too you know poor dear Herbert he he had such great faith in Willie I didn’t want him to be hurt oh well I didn’t want either one of you
To be hurt thank you Hazel well our motives were good but now we’ve got one too many well I’ll get rid of mine you tell them you found yours all right I guess we’re a pair of old softies that are worse things to be Hazel oh dear it’s
Her oh there you are hello heav hello my dear how do you do hazel hi Mr Johnson what’s that you got this oh it’s our missing flower bowl I was rumaging around in the attic and I found it you ain’t exactly dressed for rumaging in the Attic it’s rather chilly up there
And I thought it oh herit I’m so glad you’re an all soft Too well this time Hazel has really topped herself that was obvious Willie stole it why should she try to protect him I told you George she’s afraid that Johnson’s will lose their faith in people but Dorothy it’s such a dangerous thing to do now if they’re allowed to
Think that Willie is honest every trap that comes along they’ll think is honest and the next time they may be cleaned out completely oh dear I hadn’t thought of that well George the John son are such children if you must tell them tell them gently I promise to break it to them as
Gently as possible oh thank you darling now come along with me and if I seem to come on too strong give me a kick in The Shins strangely enough I still can’t quite bring myself to believe in Willie’s dishonesty nor can I I suppose it’s because I hate to admit that I’m
Not really a very good judge of character well if you’ll pardon me for saying so experience has made me a better judge now I know that we all make mistakes I only hope I haven’t upset you by uh pointing out yours oh not at all George we do seem to have
Heard yeah we’re stuck with three Marvel Bows Oh that’s your back door I’ll get it well that’s all I have to say on the subject Mr Johnson and not a single Kick In The Shins kick in the shin family joke the joke I’d ask you to explain it
To me George but I’m not in the mood for levity who was it oh is somebody you’re going to be very glad to see except possibly you Mr be okay will you can come in I got something for you Mrs Johnson did you notice yours was gone well yes we did Willie was you worried no no really not a bit gee that swell I was scared maybe You’ think I swiped it oh no we never think a thing like that Willie we’re all real good judges of character right Mr be
Right what happened was I dropped the bowl and busted it into Smither but Willie why didn’t you tell us well you was still asleep and besides you’ve been so nice to me I didn’t want you to think I busted anything but very thoughtful of you Willie the reason
I took so long getting back I didn’t have enough to pay for it and so I’ve been working at a garage most of the day washing cars oh Willie that’s much more than we deserve and you shouldn’t have paid for oh the fellow at the shop gave me a good special price 15
Bucks well I better get on out to the garage I I didn’t even make up my bed this morning you’ll find the key over the door Willie okay Mrs Johnson uh just give me a yell if there are any chores to do well since we all make mistakes maybe
You won’t mind my pointing yours out Mr B all right rub it in oh well all our problems seem to be settled now except one what in the world you going to do with those three extra bows yes that does present a difficulty hey hold on a minute I got an idea we’ll
Just do our Christmas shopping early merry Christmas ahead of time Mr be pre season greetings George happy New Year and Advance Jo thanks but you shouldn’t have done it oh yes we should after this if you’re going to jump to any conclusions just fill all of them with flowers like maybe forget me
Nuts take a card Mr B H go on take a card okay now what is it it’s nine of clubs nine of clubs rice what do you mean rice what kind of a trick is that can you do it of course I can do it remember that dollar that I owe you
Because you tricked me into betting on that fighter with a glass jaw H you weren’t tricked it was reported in the paper before the fight oh yes but you took the paper to the office so I didn’t have a chance to see it well now this is my chance to get
Even I’ll bet you dollar that you can’t do my card trick it’s a bet all right you got to do it exactly the same way I did exactly yeah you got to shuffle the cards first right here you are take a card NOP it ain’t the nine Club you lose now we’re even [Applause] I told you Mr be I know Hazel didn’t I tell you yes Hazel I said if you spend money on that old water heater just being Penny wise and pound foolish Hazel I’ll have soft boiled eggs for breakfast yeah but he wouldn’t listen to me soft
Boiled eggs pleasey it goes off I bet you had to shave with cold water this morning didn’t you yes Hazel I did yeah I warned you I said Hazel I know what you said so let’s forget it I will hire a plumber if he can’t fix it we’ll buy a
New one oh I already got one and he’s going to do it for a special price on account of I’m giving them bowling lessons oh oh fine thank you Hazel and uh will you start my breakfast oh sure coming right up oh oh is she annoying she just loves
To tell me I told you so she says it constantly you make a a lot of mistakes don’t you Dad now how do you like that Harold your father does not make a lot of mistakes then why is Hazel always saying I told you so it’s just a bad
Habit of hers that’s all I’m sure she doesn’t even realize she’s doing it she realizes all right she just waits for the opportunity how about a little coffee Mr Bee while you’re waiting for your eggs huh please remember that argument we had about who won the World Series in
1931 yes he said St Louis and I said Philadelphia there we go go again I assume you’ve checked on this now oh sure I call the newspaper and and St Louis 1 43 Hazel if you don’t stop St Louis won four games to three then I was right
Hazel I Told You So pepper Martin ran a while in that series he got a homer and four doubles and seven singles now Hazel let that be a lesson to you don’t you ever argue with me about baseball yes so but what you getting so excited about
He’s not used to being right are you dad certainly I am sport your dad knows more about baseball than anyone I know boy you’re kind of irritable this morning Mr be well I guess I am I’m sorry I didn’t sleep very well last night well that’s cuz you raided the refrigerator last
Night all right I suppose so oh sure I told you so he was out there shoveling down the lemon rang pie with both hands all right all right let’s forget about it now would you mind checking on my breakfast please oh yes sir you sure are touchy this
Morning you know you have been working awfully hard lately darling look it’s a beautiful Saturday morning why don’t you go out and play some golf boy what I like that I haven’t had a club in my hands in months well then why don’t you you don’t want to get out of condition
George well there’s no danger of that but I just can’t if Mr Griffin wants me to finish don’t tell me Mr Griffin is going to take up another weekend I’m afraid so Dorothy it can’t be helped my work comes first my work comes first too today I’m going to collect papers for
The school paper Drive good for you son here you are Mr be just the way you like them thank you Hazel and here’s the Mamay thank you and here’s the salt and pepper thank you and who won the World Series in 1926 uh New York was playing St Louis I
Know I know and I’ll give you a little hint Babe Ruth had four homers for the Yankees the Yankees won no St Louis won four games to three finish off your breakfast and get big and strong like your dad’s for so I said take her up to 5,000 ft and
The pilot said kind of nervous like is this your first parachute JN Miss but it wasn’t wasn’t oh I should say not so I said to him listen sunny I probably had more hours in the air without a plane than you ever had with one and then did
You jump yeah when we got up to 5,000 ft I climbed out of the cockpit uh excuse me hazel uh before you jump hi Missy anything I can do for you well I’m looking for my sewing basket have you seen it no not that I remember I’d like
To help you with it but you know Harold and me we got to stack up them newspapers I’ll find it why don’t you try looking in the den all right and then what happened he on then what happened oh well I yelled Yano and I stepped off into
Space sure I counted 10 and pulled my rip cord and my parachute open and there I was floating along nicely and suddenly I look up and there’s a big baldheaded eagle flying along right beside me wow so I looked him right in the eye and I said prob want a
Cracker he looked at me and he screamed it’s kind of hard to know what he said at that altitude you know I’m sorry to interrupt your work darling I haven’t started my work yet this is the official Encyclopedia of baseball I’m just brushing up Hazel’s going to wish she
Never brought up the subject oh George Don’t Feud with her that’s silly well she started with her I Told You So Harold’s begin to think I don’t know anything well that isn’t right I’m going to have a talk with her about that oh not before I go out in the kitchen and
Get my revenge we’re going to find out if Hazel knows anything about the world series of 1882 1882 that’s right that was the first World Series hey now put your finger there sport what did you do there well then I started swimming for the mainland and I told the fellas to
Hang on to the hull and i’ got back just as soon as I could how far was it oh it was about 5 miles it would would have been a breeze if it hadn’t been for the storm cuz that whipped up the waves till
They was 20 ft High wow oh well I don’t want to make it seem any harder than it was you know for in them days I was the Australian craw champion of the YWCA were you really oh sure and I was a runner up for fancy diving well anyways
I started swimming along and after a couple of hours I saw this Lighthouse boy I’ll bet you were glad oh sure course that meant that I could send help to the poor fellas that was hanging onto that boat and then what happened well the Lighthouse Keeper he called the
Coast Guard and they sent a boat out and rescued him boy hi Dad did you know Hazel got a medal for bravery one yes I knew I was telling them how I won my bronze medal not my silver one what was the silver one oh that’s another story
Sport did you want something Mr to be oh I just came out to pick up my briefcase in the car by the way Hazel who won the World Series of 1882 1882 that’s right what do you mean 1882 I mean who won the World Series of 1882 you mean they was playing baseball
The way back then that’s right baseball was reputedly invented by Abner double day in 1839 although other authorities give it an earlier date some historians claim it was invented 5,000 years ago in Egypt that’s Pete say boy you sure know baseball thank you son in 1882 the first
World Series was played between Chicago and Cincinnati there were only two games played it ended in a draw for Pete’s sake strangely enough the ball was Pitch underhanded the overhand pitch hadn’t come into use until 1884 no Kidd that was in the series between Providence and the New York Mets in which Providence
Won three to nothing I sure got to take my hat off to you Mr B boy me too well thank you both Hazel you shouldn’t be trying to lift these newspapers Harold and I’ll do this oh no Mr be I I better do it I wouldn’t want you to strain
Yourself well Hazel you think you’re stronger than I am oh no it ain’t that it’s just that you ain’t used to this kind of work and I am you know I keep myself in terrific physical condition well so do I now you just run along in the house and her’ll now finish your
Well you just take it slow and easy cuz I wouldn’t want you to strain yourself and don’t you worry Asel I’m perfectly capable handling a few newspapers okay well Mr B just take little handfuls angel will you please run along okay you know a lot more about baseball
Than Hazel does don’t you Dad well son it’s a man’s game Hazel didn’t even know they played baseball 1982 there are a few things that Hazel doesn’t know that I do know come on let’s bring out some more papers I think you’re smarter than Hazel is well I wouldn’t say that son
Hazel’s a very intelligent woman Hazel said little handful son I am much stronger than Hazel why I can lift that whole stack if I want to do could you really certainly watch this what’s the matter my back I’ll go get no no no come back here I’ll be all
Right in a second why don’t you straighten out because because I’m resting give me the r oh thanks there you are just fine you don’t look fine you look like you have to lean on the ri I’ll be all right in a few seconds son will you be able to help me
With the papers no certainly we we’ll just take out little handfuls that c so sad what yes son now look this little incident with my back we’ll keep it our little secret huh you don’t want ha to know do you no I don’t because she’ll say I Told You So boy she certainly
Would but son I know a lot more about baseball and Hazel don’t I I’ll say who won that first game what first game you know the one 5,000 years ago in Egypt Hazel I’m glad to find you here oh I’m just making some oatmeal cookies you know the kind har like yes well Harold’s the reason I want to talk to you Harold why something the matter yes uh Hazel now I know you don’t do it intentionally but you’ve given Harold
The impression that George always makes mistakes oh no well now when George does make a mistake you say I told you so you see now Harold notices that Oh you mean like about the water heater yes and about George eating before he went to bed oh well that’s terrible I think Mr
Be is about the smartest man I ever met and here I am giving Harold the wrong impression this little incident with my back is our special secret H yes sir all right now you take this back to the garage then I’ll help the pl finish
Turing the papers good boy he want a fe Tails Hazel he won’t that $2 tip will take care of that now you just run along okay Dad hi George through already yes and now I have to get those papers ready for Mr Griffin George what’s the matter sh what’s the matter with you come on into the Den now what is it oh I hurt my my back lifting newspapers oh darling George sit down here I’ll call Dr Summerfield and have Hazel fix a PO I don’t want Hazel to know a thing about this why not because she warned me and I don’t want
To hear her say I told you so oh that’s ridiculous we have to call the doctor george not while Hazel’s in this house now look I want you to make up a grocery list a real big one one that’ll keep her shopping for an hour or more then we’ll
Have the doctor here while she’s Gone Hi he oh hi car you sure took your time about coming well I’d have been here sooner only I was the late well it’s about that uh water heater on the service porch it’s been acting up for the last couple of months I’ll check it out Hazel the last time we
Had trouble we should have gotten a new one Hazel told that so uh uh sport you come here I want to talk talk to you uh you just check it up and if it doesn’t work just pull it out cuz Mr be says we might get a new one okay heel I’m making
You some oatmeal cookies SP how would you like that oh boy you and your dad have finished with the newspapers they’re all tied oh that’s good now listen I wanted to talk to you about something sport who do you think gets told I told you so more than
Anybody in the United States Dad no the president and it don’t make any difference whether he’s a Republican or a Democrat he gets told at the most what’s his mid’s name oh well that ain’t what I mean sport I mean he he gets it from the newspapers and the broadcasters and the politicians
The people everybody and you know why no because he makes the most decisions and when you make a decision you know you got to stick your neck away out and it takes a big man to do that and your dad makes all the decisions around here and
When he does it right we don’t pay any attention to it h I never thought of that yes but every once in a while he makes a mistake and when I say I told you so well that’s just kind of my way of showing off you know cuz your dad’s
One of the smartest men I know really oh yes and the nicest one too so I ain’t going to say I Told You So anymore cuz that’s a bad habit of mine boy I’ll bet dad’ll be glad well we’ll just make that our little secret shall we and I’ll just
Surprise you Dad by not saying I told you so hey girl I in here Missy oh I made up a grocery list I wonder if you could go to the store right away well I got them cookies in the oven I’ll watch them for you I’m going to need some of
Those things for lunch oh boy you think we was feeding an army I better get going this will take an hour and a half oh doc that feels 100% better well I take will give you some support George but you’d really be a lot more comfortable in bed yes George you
Certainly would Dorothy that’s out of the question I have a lot of work to do oh if he knew the real reason Dorothy that’s enough well take it as easy as you can don’t lift anything heavy avoid climbing the stairs if possible drop in
And see me again in a day or so all right fine doc I will oh standing is murder well I should think so that’s why I suggested bed no no I’ll be all right doc I just won’t be able to get up and down as much well you take a couple of
Those pills every 4 hours they’ll help relieve the pain fine doc I will and thank you very much not at all goodbye bye hey what’s the doctor doing here doctor there’s no doctor here well his car was out front as I drove up in the driveway
Oh well he just left here well who did he come to See uh Dorothy well what’s the matter with it well she she has a slight cold for Pete sake Missy stick out your tongue Hazel I’m all right come on stick it out but Hazel stick out your tongue oh it don’t look too bad you got any temperature you look a little flushed
Well her her temperature is normal uh she feels a little hot I’m not surprised I am hot I’m a little burned up what does the doctor recommend the doctor recommends the patient have a bed rest and that’s just what the patient going to again come on now
Miss no this has just gone far enough I’m not going to bed because I’m dthy dth please oh George dthy do it for me just do it for me but this is silly what’s silly about a cold D please you you you can catch up on your reading oh for heaven’s
Sakes all right I’ll go to bed we can’t have her change in her mind no no we can’t so I’m going to go up and see that she don’t good good she needs a long rest oh I won let her lift her finger good oh Mr be while I’m upstairs would
You mind going out to the car and bringing in them groceries I’d ask little Harold but some of them bags weighs the tongue thanks Mr B Mr be I got to make some chicken soup so would you mind bringing up this eggn to Missy well I just took up some fruit juice not more than 10 minutes ago when somebody has a cal they have to have a lot of liquids Hazel I have a lot of
Work to do can’t Harold take it up he’s out collecting papers I don’t suppose Dorothy could come down Mr Big all right all right I’ll take it up well I just want to finish the sentence I don’t want to lose my train of thought okay what in the world have I gotten myself
Into here I am again George you shouldn’t be going up in down those stairs I know it you know it my back Knows It But Hazel doesn’t know it set me up with this egg dog oh I can’t George I just finished the fruit juice
Well do you mind if I drink it I’d love a glass of egg do poor George You’ be my guest darling you know this is all your own fault why don’t you just tell Hazel what happened never no no no Dorothy you promised you gave you a solemn word all right but I
Feel so silly being in bed when you’re the one who’s sick yes I know and I thought I’d die when she told me that you brought in the groceries well it wasn’t too bad I used the laundry cart wait a minute I have an
Idea I know how how we can get you into bed you’re not going to tell her about my back you won’t have to but if she thinks that you’re coming down with my cold she’ll have you in bed before you know it you’re brilliant if I can bend over
I’d kiss you I’ll save you some of my magazines thank you thank you fellow patient but I still have Griffin’s work to do and that bed over there is going to be my Office oh Missy need anything uh no I just came out to uh say hello H I mean uh to get a drink of water cool Water it’s hot today oh I thought it was just comfortable well I feel hot well that’s cuz you’ve been running up and downstairs all day long I hope I’m not catching Dorothy’s cold oh for Pete sake feel a little under the weather stick out your
Tongue oh no it looks all right with his fever you got a temperature no Mr be you’re just as cool as a cucumber you begin to be kind of a type condriac well how you like the ch soup it was Simply Delicious Hazel I thought
You’d enjoy it I made it from an old recipe in Mama’s hey you feeling better completely well I’ve had a nice few hours rest here I think I’m going to get up oh no no you don’t no you stay right where you are I had a nice little talk
With Harold Missy I explained to him how I respected his dad and that my saying I told you so you know was just my way of showing off oh that was sweet of you Hazel oh well a boy’s got to look up to his father especially if he’s a fine man
Like Mr be I ain’t never going to say I told you so again really Hazel really George you keep the covers on now yes Dorothy will you come upstairs a minute please well is it important yes very important and really mean it I mean it never again missy oh no matter what he
Does or doesn’t do no matter what boy I’ve said my last I told you so oh thank you Hazel well for Pete’s sake Missy I can’t go around ruining a boy’s respect for his dad that would be awful all right all right Dorothy what is it George you may want
To reconsider your um stand uh Hazel has just said she will will never again say I told you so oh she has what’s going on here never again no matter what so why don’t you tell her what happened well how do I know I can trust her oh boy you
Must have pulled a be all right how about it Hazel you give me your solemn word have I ever broken my word to this family no no of course I’m sorry well all right if I say I’ll never say I told you so again that’s what I mean come on
Well what happened well um you remember when I came out to the garage to help uh Harold tie up the papers Oh you mean when you hit me with that hot little item about 1882 oh boy I’ll never forget it you mean you found out you was wrong oh no
No nothing like that this has to do with the papers and this is why the doctor really came here you see I lifted a large bundle and uh I sprayed my back I told you so hey this still how in here Missy besides my word don’t mean nothing as far as the
Family’s health is concerned I warned you didn’t I Mr be I warned you I said you better let me do it CU you’d only strain yourself now you’re going to get right in bed that’s what you’re going to do come on I told you just to take
Little handsful didn’t I I warn you I told him Missy but you was just showing off little arrow now come on now you just save your strength cuz I’m going to get the heating pad and you ain’t going to move off his bed for the whole
Weekend boy it makes me so go down mad when I [Laughter] Go yeah yeah yeah and this letter came from darthy at the same time as the pckage what did you say when she was coming home she said she hoped it would be in a few weeks but Aunt Barbara still needs her well so do we mother so do we well
It takes a long time for broken bones to heal and with five children to look after I don’t think Aunt Barbara is in any hurry to get back on her feet look what Darth has sent me it’s a gift for taking care of you while she’s gone darthy thinks of everything
Everything except coming home it’s a lovely piece of Dres in China she says there are lots of wonderful antique shops in the town and she found Grandma Hazel one one what they just called her she won first prize in that molasses recipe contest I knew it I just knew
She’d win well hooray for hazel what’s first prize a mink coat well I’m Mighty happy for her almost as happy as I am that dead blasted contest is over I didn’t care much for that baked potato with molasses molasses ons scrambled eggs molasses and salad dressing believe
Me I’ve got molasses coming out of my ears however if she want to make Co I guess I shouldn’t complain Hazel Harold just told us congratulations oh thanks Miss Baxter well for someone who just want a make coat you don’t seem very excited oh oh the mint coat was first
Prize I won third prize oh well it may not be a fur coat but even third prize is a great honor what is third prize a lifetime supply of molasses Boy I’m sure glad Mr be broke that little statue at not little old me he still claims it’s your fault my fault all I said was five words I said a lifetime supply of molasses darthy will be heartbroken oh I’ll get it fixed I guarantee tea now hazer you know you
Can’t put it back together again oh no no I tried for five nights but now I’m going to give it to miss Minnie well she has a little shop she’s a little old lady that has this mending shop and and they mend all delicate things you know like vases and plates
And stuff I doubt that even she could put it oh sure she can certainly she can you’ll never even know it was Busted Oh hi sport what you looking for oh I just want some milk oh I made a batch of cookies today have some see thanks well Harold you brought the box back didn’t you go to Miss Minnie’s yes I did well why didn’t you leave it couldn’t she put it together again I don’t
Know what do you mean you don’t know she wouldn’t let me in the shop why not the door’s blocked she said if she unlocked it those men would get in what men Harold what men the two men on the sidewalk she acted like they were trying to rob her
Rob what would they find a Rob in that shop if everything’s busted they were trying to break in well why didn’t you call a policeman I did well did he arrest him no he talked to to in for a minute and then then what and then he tried to get
In the shop but miss Min won’t even let him in oh I don’t believe a word of it it’s just a lot of nonsense you just stopped somewhere to play no I didn’t oh yes you did and now you can’t think of a good excuse for not doing what I told you to
Do that’s funny she don’t answer I guess she got In He said something about two men I’m terribly sorry I had to send Harold away like that but what he told you was the absolute truth you mean they was trying to rob you oh no not that part they were trying to get in here to serve illegal
Paper on me what kind of illegal paper I don’t know but but that’s why I keep that front door locked I don’t even answer the telephone well they’re gone now but they’ll be back Miss Minnie are you in some kind of trouble about the worst you
Can think of well what kind of trouble if I ain’t being too nosy about something that ain’t none of my business oh no I don’t mind telling you we’re friends why you’ve always been one of my best glue and repair customers oh yeah I guess I bust more stuff than anybody in
Town well now this trouble wait a minute I get the chair now huh oh well you remember Mr baby he used to own this shop I worked for him then oh yeah yeah he he retired well I bought the shop from him over a period of time I didn’t make any regular
Payment I just gave him what I could when I could Mr batty died about 6 months ago didn’t he well that’s just it I finally paid the shop off in full but well he died before he could give me any paper saying that the shop was mine and
Now his heirs are claiming that the shop is theirs oh what you need is a good lawyer they already have a court order impounding the Shop’s bank account and all my personal money is in that account how can I hire a lawyer when I don’t have any money you ought to go to
Mr Baxter and make an appointment and have him think up something brilliant I just told you I can’t afford to H money is the one thing that Mr Baxter ain’t interested in Justice that’s his mother he’s always in there fighting for the underdog but do you think he would do it
For me you’re an underdog ain’t you yes well then just leave it to Mr Baxter I’ll speak to him myself boy he’ll grab your case like a hungry dog grabs a bone oh miss Minnie you just take it from me you’re in Dog he’s Home Mr be’s home early huh yes he’s in the dead oh fine no no Hazel whatever you do don’t knock on that door why not don’t disturb George he’s extremely busy oh well I was just no he has a new client who’s been giving him a terrible
Time he’s head over heels in work he said not to disturb him he said it would take him a month to get things straightened out I shouldn’t wonder if he had a nervous breakdown oh boy I wasn’t expecting anything like this I better make a phone Call hello Miss Minnie uh this is Hazel oh Hazel I’m glad it’s you uh Miss Minnie uh uh they tried to serve that paper on me again and do you know what I told him I told him to take the matter up with my attorney Mr Baxter well uh uh Miss
Minnie uh when I came home I I found Mr Baxter here and uh oh that’s good thanks for telling me I’ll be right over Miss Minnie I have practically a suitcase full of papers for Mr bter to study now don’t you worry I won’t waste any time getting there miss Minny hello Hello Oh what’s the matter well nothing Lely I I didn’t know you was behind me hazel why do you keep looking out the window what do you see nothing H dad did Hazel tell you what happened today what happened she sent me over to a place called Miss Minnie’s mening shop to get
That thing you broke GL together and there were two men trying to break into no sport you were wrong there honey those men weren’t trying to break into into Miss mini shop they was just trying to serve her with a legal paper oh the lady in some kind of difficulty oh boy
Is she you see she brought this shop from a former owner on Time payments and the owner died before he could give her the ownership papers uh I thought they were robbers his ass didn’t know about it and now they claim the shop is theirs well that’s pretty common when it comes to
Settling Estates but Mr B they even tied up her bank account that’s no problem any attorney could straighten it out if she has her canceled checks receipts why don’t you send her to see me you mean it Mr B your mother said you were so busy
Well I am but you know mothers they’re inclined to exaggerate anyway in a routine matter like this I could have one of my clerks settle it you have Miss uh what’s your name Smith Miss Minnie Smith you have Miss Smith come to see me the first of the week why don’t I tell
Her to come over right away right away yeah her Shop’s only a few blocks away you’d be surprised how fast she can get here tell her the first of the week we’ll be fine okay if you say so Mr be but with her bank account tied up she
Could stop by the first of the week they’re trying to get her out of the shop and she said she’d die her she said she’d lie down and they’d have to carry her out she’d kick and scream and bite every inch of the all right all
Right Hazel go and call her tell her to come over right away Miss Minnie this is Hazel Yeah well you know what I just happen to mention your trouble to my boss Mr Baxter you know he’s an attorney tell her to bring all canceled checks receipts and correspondants pertaining to the case you hear what he said he’s fighting for you already he said here uh
Let me talk to her no no I’ll tell her I I I’ll tell her uh uh he said uh to bring all the cancel checks and receipts and and correspondence you know everything pertaining to the case that’s the kind of stuff he wants yeah mhm yeah that’s right yes Mr
Backer I’m Miss Minnie Hazel says you’re my attorney anything that has anything to do with Mr batty how soon do you think you could get over here oh fine she says she can get over before you by T night bye hello Hazel tell me Miss Minnie uh how far away is your shop about eight or 10 blocks oh but but that you know they’re very short blocks you you wouldn’t even call blocks nevertheless Miss Minnie if you can run that fast you have nothing to fear from the law nobody could ever
Catch you to serve a subpoena did you have much trouble George not a bit mother the judge took care of everything however she should have called a lawyer in in the first place you see that’s a trouble with a lot of people they are so afraid of
Courts and judges that they don’t call in a lawyer until things are in a complicated mess oh Mr be I hope I didn’t get in any trouble oh not a bit Hazel as a matter of fact I’m very grateful to you you see we met in the judge’s Chambers and I had an
Opportunity to discuss another legal matter which saved me a lot of time and trouble oh that’s likely Mr Griffin he always arrives at dinner time just like the Elephant at the water hole oh oh I’m terribly sorry to disturb you during dinner time oh that’s all right
Miss Min come on in well Mr bter wouldn’t accept any money for what he did for me so I brought him a present Mr B come here bring it in bring it in good evening Miss Min good evening oh Mr Baxter I just had to do something to
Repay you and I thought and I thought and then it came to me and I knew that you being a lawyer you’d appreciate this desk come on pleas why boy it sure is an old oh it’s a real antique it has the most magnificent history I bought it
From a woman whose great great grandfather once shared a law office with Abraham Lincoln it belonged to Abraham Lincoln no it belonged to her great great grandfather but as long as as they were in the same office it’s quite possible that Lincoln leaned on it oh boy which side knowing how interested
They are in Washington about historical objects like this I offered it to them but my letter must have gotten lost anyway I didn’t get an answer and am I glad because now I can offer it to you well thanks Miss Min but I really can’t accept it why not well I uh just
Simply can’t deprive you of any thing so valuable I knew you’d appreciate its value I insist well I I really can’t Mr B you got to accept it you’ll hurt Miss minny’s feelings but you she’ll think she’s indebted to you for the rest of her life but I
Heel I brought back your figurine too oh boy ain’t that terrific you never know it was broken come on Miss Minnie I want to show this to miss Baxter Mr baxer yes what’s this bill for delivering the desk $18 it’s after 6:00 we get overtime and
She kept us waiting an hour never mind never mind mind she had it insured on account of Abraham Lincoln lean on it believe me Lincoln never leaned on this he was too smart a man oh Thanks N Hazel Hey yes who Miss Minnie but now don’t tell me she has a chair to go with that desk oh well please ask them to come in hello Mr Baxter hello Miss min Mr Baxter I would like to meet Mr Willcox Mr Willcox is from Washington DC how do
You do Mr back how do you do Mr Willcox so nice you to drop by you know that desk I gave you oh yes Miss Minnie backward and forward coming and going I’m very familiar with it well remember I told you I’d written to the White
House about it may I ask where the desk is now everywhere Mr Willcox everywhere you look well Mr Wilcox is from one of those Washington historical societies yes I’m here to try to persuade you to part that desk well Mr Wilcox it would break my heart to part with it but of
Course I would listen to any good reason well this gracious lady’s letter was forwarded to me because for a number of years now I’ve been trying to locate that desk uh because Lincoln lead n it well not exactly in some of the old records there have been references to a
Pigeonhole desk which Lincoln used during the first year of his administration now I’m led to believe that this missing Des all the story I heard was all wrong that desk actually belonged to Abraham Lincoln himself come here I want to show you something how would you like to buy a nice old
Desk oh no well I know I’ve unloaded some awful clinkers on you in the past but this is a real prize oh no Charlie of course I have no authority to speak for the White House but I would say considering the restoration that’s been going on there it’s quite probable
They would like to restore such a desk to its place now Char I want to be honest with you you know there was some kind of a story about Abraham Lincoln having leaned on that desk but Mr be said it ain’t true so you see I ain’t
Trying to pull the wall over your eyes it but it’s a beautiful genuine old antique oh no Charlie I might add that there would be suitable recognition for the donor Mr George Baxter of this city and state Mr Willcox you needn’t say anything more as a truly patriotic citizen I would
Consider it an honor to donate that desk uh which I love so dearly where would I put it what could I do with it well you could make firewood of it as a matter of fact if you got a hatchet I’ll help you do it right Now right this way Mr Wico well I uh I thought I was here in the garage you mean you put Abraham Lincoln’s desk in your garage well of course we didn’t know it was Lincoln’s all we knew was that it was a beautiful antique and we brought it out here temporarily until we could
Uh decorate my Den to go with it uh shall we uh go into the house all he gave me was $3 for it I still claim you’re $3 ahead mother mother I brought Mr Wilcox home with me Mr who Mr Wilcox from Washington DC mother this is incredible you won’t
Believe this but many had the story about that desk all wrong it actually belonged to Abraham Lincoln what yes Mr Wilcox has been trying to trace it for years they’ll probably want to put it back in Lincoln’s Room in the White House and if they do they’ll probably
List it as having been presented to the nation through the courtesy and generosity of George Baxter what’s the matter with her George I have news for you what do you mean uh maybe you better sit down what do you mean you move sell it back for three bucks Hazel I suspect
Something is funny but I’m not smart enough to figure it out I said what do you mean you won’t sell it back for three bucks well you yourself told me how beautiful it was how much $25 25 25 as a special favor to to you some favor
But AEL when I bought it I didn’t realize what wonderful boot it was Golden Oak fil the grain Golden Oak my eye the only thing that’s keeping that desk together is the turn’s holding hands I’ll give you three bucks for It Mr B did Mrs baxon tell you what I did why do you think I’m here Mr Willcox is sitting in our living room and I’ve got to get this thing back there well now he wants 25 bucks for it all right I’ll pay it but Mr B never
Mind never mind I’ll pay it here you see Hazel had taken it to the shop for an estimate on the refinishing no no no this isn’t it Lincoln’s desk was Rosewood this is Oak well apparently my search is not yet ended Charlie what do you mean you won’t
Give $3 for this beautiful old antique hael you yourself said the only thing alling hit together was the termite holding hands Charlie look will you take $3 from us to take it away what would I do with it well you’ve done plenty with it already do you realize Charlie that
This desk belonged to a man that shared an office with Abraham Lincoln it’s almost as if honest a was standing there himself right now mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the Lord he is tramping out the Vintage where the grapes are at the Charlie Charlie will you take $4
From us to take it Five [Applause] You sure you put the dime in here yes and and no paper cup of lemonade came out here no oh well you know sometimes with the coin machines like this you got to shake them to make them work well we ought to start hearing it make
Lemonade any minute now if it don’t well we’ll just have to report it to the police I thought that would do It that’s beautiful George it’s just right for the Willoughby hallway well don’t forget to charge them for my labor you’re a darling to help I’d never have it delivered by Thanksgiving with about you that’s not bad for an amateur you forgot a little bit here Mr B where this
Corner right there all right hey D when are you going to T me out of box just as soon as I finish helping your mother isn’t that the phone I’ll get It they don’t answer let it ring well maybe they’ve gone out of town for Thanksgiving if they have we’ll just get a suet at the best hotel and wait until I get back It’s Perfectly Natural for you to visit your hometown yes I suppose so Zach honey everything’s going
To be all right I know it is George Baxter couldn’t find a better man to direct Griffin Enterprise’s new athletic program let it ring three more times please all right B your residence oh hello hello this is Zachary King speaking is Mr Baxter in please well no he’s busy at the moment may
I did you say Zachary king that’s right I’m calling long distance not the Zachary King the one that was the Olympic boxing champ I’m the one I’m flattered you’ve heard of me heard of you well for Pete sake I follows your whole career at least I have a friend in court
Well I never thought though I’d ever be talking to you personally well thank you very much Miss uh Miss Burke Hazel Burke you know I even wrote you a fan letter once but I suppose you never got it traveling around the world the way you
Do what are you doing these days are you entering your three minutes are up Sir will you please deposit another 65 cents oh I’m sorry Mr King I didn’t mean to keep you talking like this well uh goodbye and thanks for calling oh boy wa a Rosy his I was
Talking to oh for peace sake i h up on him Operator Operator don’t you have a quarter no no we’ll get some change along with the cup of coffee Operator Operator who was it Hazel Zachary King not the Zachary King Z yeah no kidding calling
Us what did he want I don’t know I got so excited I never found out well now that’s a coincidence after all these years operator what do you mean what do you mean you didn’t find out well I’m sorry Mr be I I I don’t know what made
Me do it but I just got so flustered I hung up on him operator put the phone down Hazel maybe he’ll call again where was he what what town is 65 cents from here oh Zach King you never heard of him oh well I suppose he ain’t done much in
The last couple of years you sure you got the name right why would he be calling us why not he and I grew up together and T will get you 100 he’s angling for something grew up together you know Zachary King well I knew him but I haven’t seen him since high school
Graduation and you never told me why we’ve been married for 13 years you never once mentioned it what was there to tell keep it a secret like that Mr be how come it isn’t a secret the subject just didn’t come up honey I went to
School with a lot of people I just don’t understand your never once mentioning that you were a friend of Zachary King no me neither how come Mr de B what else have you forgotten to tell me what kind of cross-examination is this a man I
Happened to know when I was not just any man Zachary King who Zachary King okay the great Zachary King whom I just just happened to know when I was a kid calls on the phone you hang up on him and now I’m being questioned like a Criminal Who
Z King just the best all around athletes in shim th ain’t that right Mr be I I guess so not only that but he was Olympic boxing champ maybe he’ll give you some point as seeing as how him and your dad is such good friends oh boy
Well I can teach Harold how to box oh but Mr King was a champ nobody ever beat him I did you did George what else haven’t you told me I don’t mean that I could have beaten him in a ring uh he could always do better in sports than I
Could well then why did you say you did because I did in this Rough and Tumble fight on my 9th birthday oh boy then that makes you the champ well at least he never tried shoving me around again was he bigger than you Dad oh he was a
Lot bigger but you were tougher hard Dad no I just got tired of his bossing me around all the time yeah like me and Harry cotton would I thought you and Harry was buddies we are boy if he wasn’t my best friend I wouldn’t even play with
Him go on George Well I got this beautiful Indian War B for my birthday from a friend of the family and as usual Zach insisted that he was going to be the chief first well I said you can take your turn along with the rest of the kids but it’s
My birthday my War Bonnet and I should be entitled to be the chief first well so he reached up to grab it off my head and I tore into him and Li him boy where don’t I tell Harry about this say another word till I get
Back hello hazel only stop by to leave these papers for George where is he back sir I’m on my way to Philly for a couple of days you’re going to be here for the Thanksgiving dinner aren’t you wouldn’t miss it for a million dollars CH a
Dressing oh sure with you hear what else mince a pumpkin pie both that’s nice Hazel but you know something my mother always had Peach cob too we had it heated up for supper along with the cold turkey out in the kitchen it just wouldn’t seem like Thanksgiving without
Peach cobbler for supper I think I can manage it where is that man backer oh George you don’t suppose he’s going to stay for lunch do you with the Willoughby cabinet to finish and the holidays coming up Hazel and I have so much to do well if he does remember
Don’t say one word about the phone call from Zachary King for you either Herold now remember both of you it’s very important all right George but why because Griffin wants me to find a man to head up a new Department back I don’t have time to explain oh guess who called us today
Hazel Zachary King right Mr be Zachary King George my boy that’s a brilliant idea congratulations now hold on a minute Mr Griffin call me Harvey Hazel you’re working for a smart man why we’ll make every news service in the country Harvey Griffin president of Griffin Enterprises in called operated has just
Announced the appointment of Zachary King as athletic coordinator of his industrial Empire oh that’s a great idea George well you’re jumping the gun on this Harvey call me har of course this whole program is your idea George it’s your baby if you want Zachary King maybe
He is worth a couple of thousand more than the fellas we talked about originally look harb I haven’t even talked to Zachary King yet I’m not sure we can even get him and I’m not sure he’s the man we want well he’s the man I
Want now you get him and don’t call me H where’s my hat I don’t have all day to talk if you want Zachary King you get him I quit but George my boy I’m sick and tired of being put in charge of something and then being told what to do
Now I’m through and that’s final oh go Mr be people have been trying to shove me around all my life and I’m not going to let you or anyone else get away with it it was only a suggestion what’s he so Huffy about I’ll go along with anything you decide it’s your responsibility
George I I wouldn’t think of interfering okay sure it is ain’t it Mr B okay oh well then you better get going Mr Griffin if you don’t want to miss your appointment I’ll be at the Beverly Towers in case you want to call me George have a nice trip Mr gri din at
1:00 I’ll be here Hazel I wouldn’t think of disappointing you why don’t we wait and call him when we get into town what makes you so hesitant about getting in touch with a childhood friend well we haven’t seen each other since high school you’ll think I want
Something let’s face it darling you do I just hate to give George a satisfaction of asking him for a job but you’re not going to ask him well people don’t get really big jobs by asking for them they have to be asked but believe me darling
All you have to do is let him know you might be available and he’ll leap at the opportunity oh can I act a little uh hard to get as long as you don’t overdo it come on honey let’s make the call All right well I suppose the real reason I
Never mentioned Zach uh I was jealous everything came so easy for him fame money I’ll get it but George you did it the hard way and now you’re in a position to offer him a job well honey if you and Harold think I’m the greatest I don’t envy any man alive
I’ll get theone Mr be it’s him it’s Zary King hello Zach I’m sorry you were cut off the first time you called how are you and where are you well we’re just outside of pedmont my wife and I are driving down to New York I’ve got to show her the old
Hometown well it’ be great to see you boy oh thanks and we’re looking forward to it too oh uh the reason I called would you mind making a reservation for us at a good hotel Mr B ask him to stay with us go ahead George ask him um
Forget about the hotel Zach you’re going to stay with us ask him if he’d like to have Thanksgiving dinner with us oh asking George we insist Zach well wait a minute let me ask Gloria he wants us to stay with him I told you we’d be glad to
Hear from you she said she’d be delighted fine now when you come to town turn right at the first stop sign that’s Maple Avenue hey I better prick up the guest room pass one stoplight turn left two blocks to Marshall Road you think I’ll have time to make some more dir oh
Well I’ll help oh oh we need fresh flowers for yeah and I got to clean the silver oh how are we going to manage oh of course not Zach it won’t be a bit of Trouble Well it’s sure been a long time it sure has hey what ever happened to Charlie Vance Charlie who Vance the redheaded kid you remember Oh you mean uh Charlie Gibson no no Vance he had a sister he played trumbone Charlie you know you and he always used to P around together
Whenever we’d had a fight oh oh sure Charlie Vance I haven’t thought of him in years what ever happened to him I don’t know oh this is a lovely house Dorothy just what Zach and I have always wanted we’ve never had a real home oh well it must
Have been terribly exciting though going from one sporting event to the next I wouldn’t have missed it for anything in the world but Zach and I have decided it’s time to land in one spot and put down some Roots haven’t we dear well not that we’re in any hurry let’s know well
No but if something really good came along have to be mighty good the Ziggler Hotel chain wanted me to work for them public relations but I can make more money on the golf tournaments sure and I guess it’s much more fun just buming across the country I wouldn’t exactly call it
Buming if you think I don’t work for a living George you’re crazy George was being envious he loves to play golf and he just never gets enough time at it what are you assum well nothing to brag about yeah but that don’t keep him from bragging anytime he gets the birdie he
Forgets all about the UN Strokes that took him to get out of the trap on the last hole oh these look wonderful hey yeah they are go on sport go on don’t be afraid oh uh Mr King how we would like to ask your favor oh would you tell my friend Harry about
The time you and my dad had the fight Harry doesn’t believe me find what find well I was telling Harold about the fight we had on my birthday you remember the Indian chiefs War Bonnet oh yes I sure do you know they used to make them out of real feathers then was a
Beautiful thing what about it well you remember we we argued over who was going to wear it first we were always arguing he the bossiest kid I ever knew me yeah miss you will you just tell the boy what happened what do you mean what happened
I wore my new Indian outfit to your dad’s birthday party and you’re Indian outfit sure my uncle sent it to me from Arizona your dad wanted to wear the Bonnet because it was his birthday so uh it was my War Bonnet a friend of my father’s gave him before my birthday and
You tried to take it away from me oh No George you’ve got it all wrong I remember exactly the way it happened I had to lick you to get it back lick me you beat me in a fight are you trying to say that I didn’t lick you fair and square well
George that’s not the way I remember it you never beat me in a fight in your life gee what am I going to tell the Kids I’m I’m sorry George but well how could I know that you’ve been making up a story like that to tell your boy you you honestly don’t remember look I remember exactly what happened it was just the way I told it I don’t see how anybody could just
Remember an important thing like that well some people just do sport maybe Mr King wants to just remember the good things and forget the bad ones I’m never going to forget this I’ll bet it happened just the way your dad said it did the only thing is I don’t know how a
Person’s going to prove it course he did make better marks than I did but one well when it came to anything physical oh well look George look I I would have gone along with a gag if I’d only known it wasn’t a gag I remember licking you at least I I thought I
Remembered I wonder if I’m going to run away from home oh no Harold you don’t mean that I do too Harold Harold Harold Missy excuse Me I’m sorry Gloria I know you are dear I’m sorry for the kid sake I’m sorry for your sake too I sure fixed any chance I ever had of getting that job it doesn’t matter about me truly it doesn’t and there’ll be other jobs just as good as this One Harold I’ve seen this happen on the witness stand perfectly honest people have directly opposite memories as to what occurred only a short time before now I had this accident case last week darling you know your your daddy wouldn’t FIB to you son I realize it isn’t going to be
Easy for you to face your friends but you can’t solve a problem by running away from it George will you leave us alone a minute well then Please Are you ashamed of your Father because if you are Harold Baxter I’m ashamed of [Applause] You [Applause] Just help yourself oh no no thank You You mustn’t blame yourself darling you’re the best father a child ever had thanks honey well I guess we better go downstairs we do have guests I’ve never been so angry at anybody in my life oh it wasn’t his fault Zach isn’t a bad fellow I’m not talking about Zach I’m talking about your
Son Mother dad what is it Harold would you come in and talk to me while I am P I knew it I knew they were around here somewhere honey let’s pack our things and leave we can send them a note no no I won’t walk out on George we’re only in the way well George is the best friend I ever had there must be something I can do Mr
King are you sure you couldn’t be wrong about anything that happened at Mr Bee’s birthday party d sure Hazel I wish I weren’t well as I remember it you said you got that War Bonnet from your uncle in Arizona right that’s right and you wore it to Mr be’s birthday party yes
Yes but I don’t see what well if you could be wrong about one thing maybe you could be wrong about something else huh of course Hazel but my memory happens to be in just take a look at this George Paxton age nine wear an authentic War Bonnet presented to him by judge
Stevens well I’ll be darned I I don’t understand oh he sent me a bow and arrow that’s what my uncle sent me and look at this picture do you see yourself there oh yes yes there I am skinny little fellow wasn’t I and and ain’t this the same
Fell with a bandage on his head I’ll get it hello oh just a minute operator darling it’s for you Philadelphia oh I’ll take him the den Hazel I changed my mind I knew you would SP oh Mr B I got something oh you go in the living room spy and you go too
Missy Mr King got something he wants to show you Harold your dad did lick me take a look at this I don’t have to think about it Mr Griffin Mr B before you definitely make up your mind I had made up my mind I am calm this time I was yelling at
Hazel uh Mr Griffin make that 2,000 a year more you can’t expect a man like Zachary King to work for penut right now I think we stand a chance of getting him for that figure okay I’ll call you as soon as I wrap up the deal bye Mr Griffin sends you his love
And says to be sure the peach cobbler has plenty of juice oh Mr be you’re a real dooy thank you Hazel now all I have to do is to talk Mr King into taking the job with your silver tongue I got a hunch it’s going to be a C and that’s all there was to it the left hook to the side of my head and down I went isn’t the cobbler ready yet as yeah coming right up you want some C Mr King well not now Hazel couldn’t possibly that’s right Zach my boy can’t have my athletic director getting
Punchy besides the less he eats the more for me show on the guy Mr King all right there that’s where he hit me but I beat him once in a spelling match he was first wait a minute spelling match now don’t tell me that you don’t remember the time that I I
Certainly do not what was the word Mr King ration I can spell that ration r a just hold it Mr Griffin you go on Mr B you spell it certainly ratiocination r a c i no that a right no you just go on and eat your cbla this spelling matches just between
Them two come on now Mr King it’s your turn Rashi otion r a t i o c i n a t i o good oh don’t feel bad Mr be you can’t be a champ at everything you are hazel well I’m just Lucky Mr B you’ll never get guess what I did this afternoon if you guess for a million years oh what’ you do I painted The Back Fence with a vacuum cleaner a vacuum cleaner yeah oh it’s terrific it’s got a spray attachment I’m going to paint the house next the house that’s
Ridiculous no it ain’t Mr be it’s kind of weather beaten in places Hazel a pickup fence is one thing and a two-story house is quite another you are not going to paint the house but I could no Hazel I don’t want to hear another word about it well I better go get my
Hammer Hammer what do you want with a hammer I got to take down my Scaffolding K the rare Hot back your res oh hi Charlie no nope I told you a thousand times I won’t go to the movies with you as long as you’re wearing that bag of go like around your neck oh go on that’s just Superstition it don’t keep off CS it
Just keeps off friends charie I ain’t got time to argue with you Kevin’s arriving any minute now oh he’s Mr be’s nephew he’s going to be staying with us for a while okay Charlie sure call later bye poor fella gets lonely won’t anybody talk to him just over the phone it’s
That way every year by the time it’s spring he’s glassy eyed and muttering to himself it’s pathetic is he here well I heard a car but I guess it was next door I fixed up the guest room I wanted to put some fresh flowers in there but
There ain’t nothing left in the garden well I’m sure a boy just out of the army can survive without flowers in his room his wife might like him well uh son uh Helen won’t be with him she won’t why not well you see sport Kevin and Helen ain’t exactly married no
More Hazel yes they are still married well she wrote him asking for a divorce any wife that do that when her husband is overseas ain’t worth oh the little snip I’d like to turn her over my knee Hazel that’s enough what’s going on well we were just telling Harold about Kevin
And Helen she’s going to divorce them yes I know somebody should give that girl a good spanking right all right you two now we don’t know how or why she came to such a decision and it’s unfair to judge her without knowing the facts any girl that tries to devor her husband
When he’s overseas ain’t worth all right Hazel let’s stop talking about it two cents and hez where’s that new box of candy I want to put it out for Kevin oh I’ll get it for you Missy I hit it in one of the top shelves in the kitchen I
Didn’t want you know who eating it all up oh Harold wouldn’t eat all that candy oh I didn’t mean Harold Mr be one of these days that woman’s going too far Harold I want to warn you about Kevin don’t mention Helen to him at all
We don’t want to make him feel badly yes I agree none of us should say anything if he wants to talk about it let him bring it up oh there he is where’s his rifle son they have to turn them in that’s a Gip oh is he here he just drove up out
In front do I look all oh you look fine hi Kevin welcome home Kevin welcome Kevin Kevin so good to see it’s good to be back welcome Kevin thanks for George hi Kevin did you bring a bay I’m afraid not Harold hey you’ve grown I know it these
Are new pants hi Kevin hello hazel how’s my favorite letter oh terrific give me a big hug that’s better boy you’re handsomer than ever that little snip must be out of her mind now that you’re back in the old neighborhood you’re going to have the time of your life
Right Mr Bee right Hazel you’re going to meet some nice girl and you’ll just forget that little snip ever existed what should we go in the house we have a lot of catching up to do oh no here I’ll get it can you bring a hand oh
Hell anything you for your father and mother Kevin no just as they’ll be getting back from Florida next week oh I sure appreciate your putting me up until then oh don’t be silly you’re welcome to stay here as long as you like sure you couldn’t be more welcome if you was a
Blood relative Hazel he is a blood relative well I mean to mine I think you just D to call all your old friends well uh not right away I’ll see well let’s go on inside sure come on in well Kevin then your friends will probably be
Called and you I bet you wrote them all you was coming home no uh nobody except you and my parents and uh and you oh well then how do you expect to get back in circulation well I’m really not sure I want to get back in circulation if you don’t mind i’ I’d
Like to go upstairs and unpack same room same room uh I’ll be down a little While well he’s certainly changed yeah the Sparkles all gone out of him he’s been hurt and he’s withdrawn from people I guess well we’ll get him back in the swim Hazel please don’t interfere oh Mr B you know I got this terrific understanding of psycholog Hazel Kevin
Will resent any effort on your part oh excuse me Mr B back to Residence oh hi Charlie no I don’t think Mur go out with you either well you got to face it Charlie that bag of garlic around your neck is a social handicap of course you can just call
Anytime and if I ain’t here just talk to Mr be or anybody that answers the phone sure Charlie Bye Kevin yes is everything all right you’ve been up here nearly an hour everything’s fine would you like me to help you unpack no thank you Aunt darthy oh well um you come down when you’re ready all right yes well I suppose so yes well if you didn’t wear that bag of
Garlic maybe you prob that Superstition well maybe your grandmother was wrong look would you like to talk to Hazel she’s right in the kitchen and I could well yes Charlie I can understand you’re wanting to talk to a man once in a while but Charlie my wife has something very
Important she wants me to do yes right away all right goodbye Charlie ye gods what has that woman gotten me into forget about that George I’m worried about Kevin his door is cloes and when I spoke to him he would hardly answer me really well maybe the kid’s very depressed
I’ll go up it’s like Charlie said on the phone sometimes a man wants a man to talk to well I don’t think that’s the answer George I think please will you let me handle it Uncle George yes how you doing old buddy fine uh how would you like to sit
Down and have a little bull session not right now well I’ll tell you what uh why don’t you come down when you’re ready all Right that’s probably the best cake I ever baked and when it cools I’m going to frost it we’re going to have it tonight for dinner with vanilla ice cream how’d you do George I didn’t get any farther than you did what’s the matter well it’s Kevin he’s still up in
His room are you kidding is he sick I don’t think so he just seems to want to stay up there oh I better go check on this oh now Hazel we both been up there if he won’t talk to us he certainly won’t talk to you oh but there’s a
Difference Mr be you see I got this terrific understanding of psychology oh brother so I honestly don’t think it’ll do any good well it won’t do any harm will it no well then I’m going to give it a try that woman is incredible did you
Ever see such ego oh it’s not ego George she’s concerned about Kevin Dorothy it’s ego now she knows that I didn’t get any place with him so she wants to go up there and show me up well I’ll have the last laugh because she’ll be down those stairs in exactly 2 seconds
Kevin are you decent [Applause] yes grab me a little sa time huh yeah yeah something like that reminds me of the summer you stayed here when you was a kid oh boy the time I had getting you up in the morning yeah yeah I remember you remember how I did it uh-huh Oh Hazel now come on now I’m a grown man you wouldn’t no you wouldn’t you’re done well come on now level with me what are you doing sitting up here in your room oh just thinking oh down in the dumps yeah yeah I guess so you shouldn’t
Be now you back in your hometown well big deal oh I see well Kevin you got to start thinking about your future you know you got to start making plans what would you like to do go back to school no no I want to
Get a job oh what do you want to do I don’t care as long as I make money well you might as well do something you enjoy most jobs pay a living wage I don’t want to make a living wage I want to make big
Money and lots of it after all what else is there in this life oh for Pete’s sake there’s lots of things there’s love what like my wife’s oh no not like her a little sniff no but there’s your family and your friends my friends oh why do you say
That all them wonderful kids that Hazel you know when I first went overseas my wonderful friends wrote me regularly 6 months later they wrote me sometimes and a year later my wonderful friend stopped writing oh for Pete sake why well it’s just put it in its kindest light and say
That they were all struck down by a plague of writers cramp oh no Hazel you know while I was overseas the only letters that I could really count on were from my parents my relatives and you your letters were wonderful they were the only ones that
Really let me know what was going on in the old neighborhood oh well I was glad to do it but your friends Hazel I don’t want to talk about my friends I don’t want any part of them but it just doesn’t make sense no it sure don’t kids that have been friends
All through their lives don’t turn on a pal when he’s overseas that’s crazy but if they stopped writing I’m sure it was just a matter of getting caught up in their own lives uh finding jobs uh getting married having babies and things like that oh sure of course there’s
Terrific bunch of kids say I got an idea why don’t we get them all together we can have a surprise party on Friday night for Kevin hey that’s a great idea it certainly is when Kevin sees how they really feel about him he’ll be a changed person there’s just one problem though
Who were his friends oh for Pete’s sake Missy and me no more we can phone him tonight Bill k k first of all he was Kevin’s closest friend sure and herb talet and Al Scott oh and Jim Barker and Auggie Myers B Denton it was a wonderful dinner Hazel oh thanks Missy is Kevin still in the dining room he’s in the living room he’s playing running with Harold and George oh terrific we can make the phone call then I got the list right here who likes ponies the most her
But hello her this is Hazel Burke over at the Bon well I’m terrific and have I got some good news Kevin Burke is back in town ain’t that exciting well you well you could show a little more enthusiasm listen we’re giving him a surprise party Friday night and we want you to be
There well you could go to oh well if you change your mind I would oh okay her bye can’t come that’s what he says but I should think someone could go to the movies any old time well maybe it’s the last day of the Run yeah
Yeah I guess that was it well let’s called Jim bker oh Jim Barker went to Camp with Kevin hello Jim Hazel Burke over at the boxes oh I’m terrific how are you oh SW say have I got good news guess who’s back in town Kevin burket well that ain’t a very nice thing
To say goodbye to you what was that all all about as soon as I mentioned Kevin’s name he said tell him to go jump in the lake and then he said first tell him to put rocks in his pocket For Heaven’s Sake something Funny’s going on here Missy first herb
Is as cold as a sard’s elbow and then Jim says to tell Kevin to jump in the lake now let’s not jump to conclusions Hazel uh call Bill Kincade now he was Kevin’s closest friend I know he’ll want to come no it’s funny a it hello hello Bill Hazel Burke over at the
Boxes oh I’m terrific how are you well I’m glad to hear it say Friday night would you be free to go to a party oh terrific uh now brace yourself the backers are giving a surprise party for Kevin Burkett yeah he’s out of the army and back in town what do you
Mean well you you just said you was free but why wouldn’t you want to see your oldest friend well he used to be your friend bill I got to straighten this out is it okay if I come over and see you okay yeah I’ll be there in about 15 minutes bye what’s going
On Missy I think I smell a rat and the rat’s that little sniff that’s trying to divorce Kevin she’s poisoning everybody’s mind against him oh [Applause] thanks well I guess you figing I’m here about Kevin yes did you know his wife is going to divorce him yes we know we
Still see her every once in a while well you know you’ve helped us out when we’ve had her over to parties does she ever talk about him oh yes many times well for Pete do you just sit there and let that little snip run your friend down
She isn’t a little snip Hazel she’s a very fine person Kevin is no longer a friend of mine not after the way he’s behaved why what do you mean his letters from overseas oh at first they were all right he was the same old Kevin and then well he started
Asking about Helen oh what other it she’s his wife ain’t she he wanted to know about the other men she was seeing Oh no of course she wasn’t seeing anyone and I wrote him and I tried to reassure him didn’t do any good he wanted me to
Spy on her oh for pach sake I can’t believe it well it wasn’t just bill that got the letters all of Kevin’s friends did and they were getting worse and worse finally we just stopped writing to him it wasn’t any use we couldn’t reason with him and that’s when he really
Started on Helen yeah I I I just can’t believe it Hazel one day I stopped by Helen’s just after she’d received one she was almost hysterical and told me to read it it accused her of having a big fling at a dinner party bill and I gave
Well you remember the one you helped me with the beef stroken off oh Helen was just sick Hazel you see she loved him very much but he wouldn’t believe it no matter how many times she told him so in her letters he wouldn’t believe it well finally she just
Couldn’t take it anymore well maybe I’ve been unfair I I just took Kevin’s part because well you know he’s he’s one of the family I know and Helen’s from out of town and I never really got to know her I know course we had her over to the
House once in a while and I used to see her around town oh Jee I feel kind of sick inside oh I hate to say but that’s that’s Jin again oh look at him he’s wining every hand well here what always says lucking cards unlucky them all h s
Son oh that’s all right he didn’t mean it hi Hazel Kevin I’d like to have a little talk with you yes Hazel not here in the den oh not now Hazel we’re playing cards right now Hazel I said no and I said yes I don’t care if you fire me now M what in the world well at least answer the phone back the residence oh yeah just a minute who you Mr be who is it Charlie well uh Hazel you look very serious well I feel very serious you know the baxes and me were planning a surprise party for you but the surprise
Was on us none of your friends it come well that doesn’t surprise me well I suppose not but I wanted to know the reason so tonight I went over to Bill and Gloria kades well well they told me they told me why they stopped writing you overseas you ought to be ashamed of
Yourself why should I be ashamed for writing them crazy letters to Helen where did you get them silly ideas about her where did I get them how can you ask me that I got them from your letters what every letter you wrote you kept telling me about seeing Helen at some
Party or at the beach or or some place you always made such a big point about how much fun she was having I was just trying to cheer you up cheer me up when a man is overseas he doesn’t want to hear that his wife and some fell he’s
Never heard of just want a dance contest oh well that was a private party I was there helping out and she was dancing the Charleston with Betty Dawn’s father father yeah sure oh wait a second what about the you said you saw saw her at the bowling
Center and she was entered in the mix doubles well she did with some fell by the name of Henry sharp and that they won and that she kissed him sure she kissed him on the cheek you know Henry I do not Karen Shop’s brother he’s only
12 oh no well what about the picnic at the beach in the Moonlight swim that was a church picnic there was over a 100 people there I told you that in the letter I don’t remember that it seems you only read what you want to read you you mean I’ve been wrong about
Everything she’s never done anything out of line as far as I know oh Hazel oh this is awful I you see I I loved it so much and while I was I was so lonely and my imagination would get to working and well I just couldn’t help it I
Guess I guess I loved her too much oh no that ain’t it you just didn’t love her enough if you loved her you would have trusted her well don’t just sit there go get Mr Beast car you got a lot of making up to Do and I’ll make it up to you Helen I don’t know I can’t forget those letters you’ll forget I’ll make you forget I’m the one who’ll never forget them orever stop being ashamed of them I love you do you love me I used to I don’t know even a little Kevin
Things can’t be the way they were not all at once I just don’t oh here you are I thought I heard the car drive Missy Mr B Kevin’s here with Helen oh gee it’s terrific seeing you again Helen come on in uh I just wanted you to see that I at
Least made a start I’m glad we all are I got your bag all pack oh well Hazel you see we haven’t I don’t think we’re ready to one of your shirts has a button off I was going to s it on but I figured you know how to sew on buttons don’t you
Helen oh yes but I terrific why don’t you two drop around for dinner sometime next week Hazel Hazel too much has happened we can’t just take up where we left off well it’s like Mr be’s always saying to me hazel you got this terrific understanding of psychology so what do
You think a young couple ought to do if they break up so I says it all depends if they’re in love or not if they ain’t it’s all off but if they really love each other deep down in their hearts then they just forgive and try again
That’s what I said to Mr B what do you think let’s go Home thank you all thank thank you all very much keep touch thank you goodbye everybody bye bye is that wonderful you really think it’ll work out oh it’ll work out if they work at it remember George we had to yeah back to the residence oh yeah just a sec it’s for you Mr
Be see I’m so happy I’m all puddled up hello oh hello Charlie no I’m afraid not oh yes I know it’s an outdoor sport but I don’t play tennis anymore well I’m sorry you’re lonely Charlie but oh that’s a Superstition really Charlie well I’ll be darned oh well I’ll be talking to you
Real soon goodbye well now that’s a curious thing what is Mr be well what Charlie just told me he hasn’t had a cold in 25 years [Applause] Oh good morning Mr B what juice are you going to have this morning what kind do we have oh just anything you like just name it all right grapefruit no pineapple no as am I mistaken or didn’t you just tell me that all I had to do
Was name it yeah but you ain’t named it yet try apricot next all right apricot nectar right on the button oh Mr B you’re getting better every Day Hazel is brought to you By coming well last Morton how are you I’m just fine Hazel how are you I’m fine we you just in time for a cup of coffee oh thanks I was hoping you’d ask me for coffee well what do you know about that how’s the employment agency business
Hazel you wouldn’t want to quit your job here and go to work for one of my clients would you oh I see is it that good that you have to go around stealing other people’s help that’s right and besides I want all the best housekeepers
In town under my colors in my own stable so to speak oh I see well if I ever want to go in the stable I’ll let you know it’s just a figure of speech actually Hazel business is so good that I’ve decided to sponsor a contest I need
Your help oh what kind of a contest to find the best housekeeper in town it’s a little promotional idea of mine it should bring me a lot of good publicity here I brought you an entry blank oh well I’m so busy and besides I’m getting kind of tired of entering contest I
Thought you like contest Hazel yeah sure I used to but all you done is talk about how much good this is going to do you you haven’t said a thing about what it’s going to do for the contestants oh oh oh oh yes well the first prize is two trips
To the New York World’s Fair the New York World’s Fair oh boy well what are we waiting for give me a pen you said just the right word all I got to do is write in a 100 words what a terrific housekeeper I am and why
I deserve the prize and and the teachers from the homemaking class in the high school are going to be the judges well it sounds simple enough yeah and the 10 best essays get a prize and then they go on to be finalist and the grand prize is
A trip to the World’s Fair no two trips on a jet plane that sounds very exciting Haz well I wouldn’t mind winning a prize like that myself are you sure you can get along without me for a few days Hazel believe me if you win this contest
We’ll be more than happy to give you the time off Harold’s birthday is coming up in a little while and I thought maybe Hazel you mean you’d be willing to take Harold with you well I can’t think of anybody I’d rather take that’s very generous of you Hazel then it’s all
Settled except for one little thing what little thing is that now I got to win the contest and besides the usual things that housekeepers do I do a lot of special things like driving Harold to school and picking him up and getting dinner for unexpected guests that Mr
Baxter my employer is always bringing home so with deep humility I respectfully request that you consider my qualifications humbly yours Hazel Burke PS one of the finest housekeepers in the Western Hemisphere what do you think Mrs plunet oh I vote Yes it’s a Charming letter you don’t think she’s a little too uh
Forward such enthusiasm it’s positively contagious well it does have a certain ring of sincerity very well miss hazelberg you are finalist number 10 hello oh just a moment Harold it’s Mr Morton Mr Morton where’s Hazel Hazel she’s the back you’re talking to Rie I’ll get she’ll be here in just a moment
Mr Morton oh really oh how exciting hael will be so thrilled yeah here she is now hello oh I am I I did I will oh boy I’m one of the finalist in the contest they pick my essay well ask them about my essay I I I want a prize an
Electric can opener well what about me what about the other finalist Lester oh well uh Mrs Masters yes I know she’s the housekeeper at the Richardson’s yeah all right Lester I’ll be ready when the judges get here the judges didn’t pick your essay I guess they didn’t like your literary style
Rosie see if I care sure what do you care you can bring your cans over here and use my can opener oh okay buron just keep your old can opener Rosie you don’t have to to be so Huffy about it that’s the way the Wheel of Fortune spins round
And round she goes and where she stops did you say the judges were going to come here oh sure Lester says they’re going to be going through this place with a fine tooth comb well I just hope they don’t find your sink all full of dirty dishes don’t you worry it’s going
To be so terrific they’re going to wonder if anybody ever lived here I suppose the judges come today or tomorrow morning well they wouldn’t do a thing like that without letting me know Hazel they won’t give you any warning at all all they won’t but of course not
They want to see what your house looks like on an average day not after you’ve gone and gussied everything all up you think so well of course oh listen Rosie you better get going cuz I haven’t got time to talk to you anymore now hey what’s the big idea you said that they
Want to see this house as it looked on an average day didn’t you yes well then I got to get busy and have it look like it looks when it’s average if I have to stay up all night why you coming Angel oh what are you
Doing up it’s way past your bedtime I couldn’t sleep would it be cheating if I helped you oh no no it wouldn’t be cheating but I don’t think your dad would like it if he knew you was down here you better go upstairs and get back
To bed I couldn’t sleep Angel um tell me some more about the Will’s fair oh well they say it’s terrific sport they say they got dinosaurs that are just as big as this house and then there’s a there’s a ride called the magic Skyway it takes you right into the
Future and then we’ll take a trip underwater where they have South Sea Pearl divers and then there’s a big octopus that tries to reach out and grab You hello There’s real purposes that do stunts for you and there’s a whole circus you can go to and then you can go on the Santa Maria just like Christopher Columbus and Sport for PE sake I put him to Sleep Hazel oh I was hoping you was the judges no sign of them yet oh I’m practically wearing out the windows looking for them thanks for doing the groceries for me oh you’ve done a wonderful job Hazel you must be exhausted well I’ll feel better when I get a cup of Coffee [Applause] I think it’s the Judges may we see Miss Hazel Burke please please come in thank you I’m Miss Burke’s employer Mrs Baxter I am Miss Dart and this is Mrs plunet how do from the homemaking class at the high school perhaps Miss Burke has told you that she is a contestant and the housekeeper of
The month contest yes she mentioned something about it yes Mrs plunet and I are here to judge Miss bur’s qualifications well I can vouch for the fact that Hazel is a magnificent worker that Mrs Baxter is only one of the things on which Miss Burke will be
Judged in addition we will examine her attitude willingness to work and her alertness and attention to detail well please sit down and I’ll go and get her why don’t we come with you why don’t you I’d like you to meet well she must have dozed off I must have dropped off to sleep
Hazel I guess it’s the late hours I’ve been keeping H for hazel oh you you ain’t the two ladies that are going to judge me in the contest are you oh well ain’t that Nice Hey I just made that bed fresh this morning we want you to make it again miss Burke just as fast fast as you can Oh you mean sort of a speed test speed and efficiency not yet Ready set go you’re sure quiet up There why don’t they make any noise mother do you think K will fell asleep again oh Harold I certainly hope not 74 seconds not exactly a record but within acceptable limits very well shall We Carry On you haven’t looked at my Refrigerator Dorothy there’s a strange car in look driveway the judges are here for Hazel’s kind FAS how’s it going I don’t know but they’ve been here for 2 hours I believe that will be all Miss Burke and thank you very much well thank you Miss D oh
Mr B I I’d like you to meet Mrs plunet and Miss Dart they’re the judges in the housekeeping contest this is my employer Mr Baxter how do you do how do you do well if you’re all through with me I’ll get back to work you know a mother works
From son to Son but a housekeeper’s work is never done well come on SP well uh won’t you come into the living room and sit down thank you I don’t know what we do without Hazel would you say that Hazel knows how to keep her place I mean does she
Thoroughly understand whose boss with hazel around uh there is never the slightest doubt who the boss is does Hazel ever stick her nose into other people’s Affairs or hand out advice when it isn’t asked Hazel does have her own opinion about things and she often shares them with us would you
Say that Hazel is enterprising when the situation calls for it I can say that Hazel is one of the most enterprising people I’ve ever known very well well we must go Mr maxter Mrs Baxter thank you can you give us any idea as to how Hazel scored I’m afraid not that wouldn’t be
Fair to the other contestants Miss Burke will be notified of the outcome not later than 6:00 p.m. next Wednesday what do you think Hazel I don’t know Miss DOT don’t sound too crazy about me a don’t say that is we’re still going to win well all I know is if
I lost that contest because I was asleep when the judges got here I ought to be sent a lot further than the world’s there and on a one-way Ticket is this a private Seance or can anyone join hi Dad come on ring May busted broken how can a phone be busted come on ring will you you please tell me what you’re doing the judges said they call me Wednesday at 6:00 hello they hung up telegram from Miss hazelberg thank
You well maybe this is what you’ve been waiting for Mr B what do you think I ought to do well you could open it here goes boy oh yippy we won really well almost listen you have tied for first place in housekeeping contest with Mrs Louise Master that’s Edie’s mother he’s my P
The judge decided the only way to break tie is to have bake off Saturday morning 10:00 a.m. High School cooking class congratulations last to a Bake Off nobody BS better than Hazel oh now son don’t get your hopes up too high this other lady could be pretty good too
Hazel uh do you know anything about this Mrs Masters well she’s new in town but I know she’s a widow and the girl say she’s awful good oh don’t worry Hazel we can’t lose now well I don’t know whether we can’t lose all I know is that if I do
Lose it’ll be sort of like Leonardo da Vinci flunking an out class well never mind scort you come on out in the kitchen and we’ll bake a cake just to keep in shape Ladies we are gathered here to witness a bake off between the two finalists in our contest housekeeper of the month sponsored by the the Morton Agency for domestic Health our two finalists Miss [Applause] hazelberg and Mrs Louise Masters are deadlocked in competition now in order to help us pick
The grand prize winner the ladies will bake a pineapple chiffon cake using their own recipes and ingredients they will be judged on the basis of technique and neatness as well as the appearance of the cake themselves very well ladies you may start when I tell you and may the best lady win ready
Go good Luck this is exciting isn’t it Harold mhm but Hazel’s bound to win she is neither going to win m mother’s going to win and we’re going to the World’s Fair your mother isn’t half as good a cook as Hazel yeah how come you know so much
About it all right boys enough now Mrs Masters and Hazel are both good cooks and it’s going to be very difficult for the judges to pick a winner kind of like an oldfashioned horse race a it Lady is since the fat is in the fire so to speak may I suggest that you all adjourn to the refreshment table to await the outcome of the contest thank you are we going to win Eddie Eddie you’re not supposed to be here now go over and get some refreshments H okay mother
Well I guess it’s out of our hands now isn’t it oh so you can talk after all I didn’t mean to be unfriendly I just didn’t want anything to distract me Miss Burke oh that’s okay Mrs Ms I’ve been busy too you just called me hazel Louise
You know Eddie has his heart so set on my winning this contest that I don’t know how I can face him if I were to lose oh I know Harold expects me to tie a ribbon around the World’s Fair and give it to him for a birthday present
Well Eddie’s father died 6 months ago yes I know well it’s just been the two of us since then and Eddie’s taking it pretty hard and when I heard about this contest I thought the trip might help him to well forget excuse me and I had to go and bake the best
Pineapple chiffon cake I ever made in my Life friends the moment we have been awaiting is almost at hand in a few minutes we will discover which of these ladies is our grand prize winner that looks very good Mrs Masters and now for Miss burk’s Cake we won we won well I must say the stalemate appears to be broken congratulations Mrs Masters and bonvoyage from the Morton employment [Applause] agents Hazel what happened well I don’t know I guess we’ll have to use this as a door stop you told me we couldn’t lose Hazel I’m sorry
Sport what about Le the N the van Minsky well I guess he was a better artist than I am a Cook I still can’t believe it Hazel’s never had a cake fall in her life oh George backx do you think for one minute the vet cake just fell Dorothy are you suggesting that Hazel lost this contest on purpose no who would like a nice piece of pineapple chiffon cake I just baked
You know if at first you don’t succeed Hazel did you know that Mrs Masters lost her husband recently oh yes it seems I did hear something about that hey so what would happen if someone accidentally turned the oven off before the cake had finished Rising oh it would
Fall flatter than the pancake but there’s no such thing as that happening accidentally anybody that did that would have to be awful dumb sport I guess you’re pretty mad at me huh no Hazel I’m not mad at all can I tell Hazel the good news what good news we’re going to the
World’s Fair dad’s taking us next summer now we can all go instead of just you and me you want me to go too Mr be you too Hazel you hear that what instead of getting fired for letting my cake fall I’m going to the world’s F I think we’re all entitled of one
Mistake Hazel come on we better get started where are we going Hazel well your dad said he taking us to the world’s fed didn’t he we got to start packing Summer’s only 10 months away we can’t wait till the last [Applause] minute Hi George neighbor Hi Neighbor Hey sir oh oh oh I’m sorry Mr be I didn’t mean to block the door but I pinched my finger I want to get a Band-Aid what are you trying to do well there was a little mixup at the furniture store Mr B and they didn’t
Send the no’s bed so I told them they could use this didn’t I tell you that’d be trouble when you got my partner interested in that house next door but Mr B we ain’t using it put it back in the basement but what are they sleep on
Put it back in in the basement they can go to hotel he can afford it I know he bowed enough off of me this morning Dorothy this old bedar stays in the basement you understand oh George you’re absolutely right it would be so much easier for Harry and his bride to
Sleep in our guest room what well you know they’re having their bed custom made and it might take two or 3 weeks but surely we could put them up for that long never mind let go let go I won’t have you straining yourself with this bed this is man’s work I’ll carry it
Over to Harry nles Myself Hazel is brought to you By Dorothy this dinner has been a lifesaver anybody for all coffee no thanks I’ll have some please Hazel Dy once again let me tell you how much we appreciate your inviting us over for dinner tonight oh the pleasure is all of course it is after all Rita shouldn’t
Have to cook after all that work of moving into a house of course not uh on moving day uh most people go to a restaurant and incidentally there’s a very good one on the other side of the park very handy but fortunately uh living next door like this we can have the pleasure
Of your company and we certainly appreciate your letting us have that bed boy am I going to to sleep tonight oh me too I’m bushed i m the lawn all day all day yes Hazel I noticed that if you cut that lawn once you cut it 10 times I’m a
Perfectionist she wanted to see what the movie Men took into your house well okay so I’m curious well if you’ll excuse us I think we better be getting back next door we got a million things to get straightened out and put away it’s terribly rude to rush off like this but
Everything over there is in such a shadow we w’t feel guilty we understand now don’t forget Dorothy I’m depending on you and your good taste help me decorate my home oh I’m looking forward to it well good night all night good night oh Harry um you go on I’ll be along in a
Minute Hazel um before I go I wonder if I could have a little talk with you sure uh privately oh oh yeah sure let’s just step into the den you excuse me certainly R where does she get that stuff let’s step into the dance Dorothy that’s my
Room my study my office when I’m home suppose I had confidential papers lying on the table George if you’re not smart enough to put confidential papers away don’t blame Hazel now come on help me clear the dinner T Hazel I want to ask you for your help oh sure anything I can do just name it George the idea for years you’ve been criticizing Hazel for evees dropping and now you’re doing the very same thing yourself come on Dorothy you know what
Re is going to try to do don’t you she’s going to try to get hazel to do a lot of her housework on my time well Harry and I’ve only been married a few weeks and I do so want to make a success of this marriage one year that’s how long I give
That marriage one year George that’s a horrible thought to have for a newly married couple a guy who’s been a Playboy all his life so marries a professional singer they’re just not geared for domestic life one year marriage is something so new to me I’ve
Already had my success as a singer now I want to be a success as a wife and that’s why I need your help well if Hazel’s going to help 6 months that’s how long I give that marriage 6 months I want our marriage to be like
George and Dorothy’s I want you to help me be like Dorothy isn’t R sweet and I want you to do for Harry what you’ve done for George I’m very fond of Harry but I don’t want to waste that on him you’ve created a an atmosphere in their home
Atmosphere is that what they call it I thought the word was catastrophe well it’s true their marriage is the most important thing in the world to me I suppose every now and then I get under Mr be skin but really down inside he knows I love him he knows
Oh sure he knows it ain’t the sort of thing you can put into words or or show by doing little things it’s it’s love and he knows well let’s uh get the dishes off the table somehow all of a sudden I don’t feel so smart Aly darling we can’t just sit here like
This all day why not because we’ve got all these things to put away we’ve got all the rest of our lives to do that no why don’t we get hazel to do it because Hazel works for George she’s got enough to do to run his house now Harry look this chest of
Drawers that you brought from your bachelor apartment it simply won’t work here in the bedroom there isn’t enough room for it all right we’ll put it in the guest room all right let’s transfer your things to the new dress all right here Harry Yes dear why did you wait so long to get
Married I was waiting for you well now you really can’t expect me to believe that it’s true All My Life I Lived like a Hermit just waiting for you har you know I wasn’t born yesterday myself I know there had been girls in your life I suppose I should be ashamed
Of it but until you there’s never been any real romance in my life no not a hint of it I buried myself in my law work if a pretty girl happened to pass by I was too busy even to notice it what here you what
Dear where are you going I think I heard the telephone ringing what telephone I better answered the telephones haven’t even been installed yet Harry I’m if you know I brought you another trash can ain’t that something so and lovey don’t know anybody else is Alive Dorothy our phone hasn’t been installed yet I use yours well of course Harry right there I use the one in the Hall it’s personal and how it’s personal Mr n’s office Susan this is Mr null oh hello Harry please Susan since I’m married not Harry Mr n yes Harry I mean Mr no Susan I let you and your roommate use my apartment for a month while I was in Europe remember naturally I remember they were red
Decorating our place and when you but did you or your roommate leave a chiffon negl in the bottom drawer of my chest of drawers you found it then you did we couldn’t find it any place my roommate thought your cleaning woman took it but we didn’t say anything
About it because we didn’t want to get anybody into any trouble oh you didn’t want to get anybody into any trouble oh good morning Hazel good morning Miss no look at this where’d you get that in the trash can really it’s practically brand new well it’s it’s very beautiful isn’t
It oh sure it’s real a more toour a more stuff you didn’t want to throw it out did you you know sometimes these things get mixed in with the Trash well I sort of had a hunch Mr n made a Mistake Hazel I have a hunch your hunch was right well I got to go find Harold oh Harry George will be down in a minute he’s Getting Dear is this what you’re looking For well everything’s hunky dory next door I tell you it’s a wonderful feeling helping a couple like that start off that marriage on the right foot that NE was practically new Mr n must have picked it up with some other stuff and dumped it in the
Trash can for heaven’s sakes well boy he ain’t much of a lawyer if he ain’t more Wide Awake than that boy that must have cost 30 or 40 bucks if it cost a done that negl oh if George ever did a thing like that to me he would never hear the
End of it well fortunately I was on my toes and I guess after this Mr n’s going to be Too did R to get mad at Harry for doing such a thing no she had the sweetest smile when I told her not a cross word I tell you my spirit’s hanging over that house like a guardian angel where’s George hurry what where’s George well well he’s gone to the office
I have to talk to him well I don’t think he’s there yet Harry well how soon will he be there well it depends on whether or not he stop somewhere on the way Mr n I’m fixing some chicken noodle soup for you and Mrs N for lunch it’ll be ready
Just as soon as the water boils oh good that’s just what I need some more hot water Hazel thought you’d cook it here and then bring it it over she wasn’t sure whether your gas was on take my word for it the gas is off what’s the
Matter you’re not your usual cheery self that neglige she gave my wife belongs to my secretary your secretary what was it doing in the trash can that’s what I’ve been trying to explain to my wife for the last half hour oh Mr bastter yeah Susan thank goodness you’re here why what’s the
Trouble judge caffy called about 10 minutes ago and wanted to speak to Mr no but I can’t reach him his telephone hasn’t been installed well what was it about you know he wants to examine the pre-trial testimony of the Wilson versus Hamilton case he needs it right away oh
Well technically Mr NL is still on his honeymoon so I’ll handle it bring the testimony in here I’ll check and see the judge Cy gets it right away that’s the trouble what do you mean we don’t have a copy of the testimony in our files oh
Where is it it’s at Mr n’s home at at his home well I just came into the office now don’t tell me I have to go all the way home again well I could go get it for you no no no there isn’t time
For that I have to check it first and if judge caffy has to read it well I can go with you and when you finish I’ll take it to him it’s a good idea come with me thank you besides I’m curious as to what his new wife looks like well if anyone
Else is curious about meeting the newlyweds just tell them to drop around my house anytime night or day they’re always there did Mr Baxter say where he was going I see all right thank you you came in the office and went right out again oh I’m terribly sorry Mr n when I
Found the neglige I didn’t have the slightest idea oh you’re not the one that needs the idea I’m the one that needs an idea I think I’ve got it what what is it well suppose you two go over to my house to sort of help Rita straighten things
Up you know she’s been asking questions about my secretary but she’s never seen her now suppose you casually start to describe my secretary mention the fact that she’s 62 years old 62 years old I mention the fact that she’s been with the firm since it was founded back in
1800 wait a minute if she was with the firm back in the 1800s she must be over 62 by now good good the older the better you don’t have to overdo it just describe her as an attractive gray-haired woman with a mustache sort of sort of like mine Harry don’t be
Preposterous describe her as the motherly type that ain’t no way to start a marriage Mr n now listen Harry you said that you let your secretary and her roommate use your apartment while you were in Europe yes theirs was being redecorated well one or the other left a
Negl by mistake well there’s nothing wrong in that unless you make something wrong out of it where you pulled the bone was trying to hide it as you see you created suspicion where there was no need for it I I know your secretary Harry she’s a very lovely girl just
Because she calls you by your first name don’t mean it’s a great big romance R loves you Harry Harry she doesn’t care anything at all about the other girls you knew before her no any more than Missy Minds the girls in Mr BEAST’s life what girl I was thinking of
Phoei who’s Phoebe you know the girl Mr be was going with when he met you well I didn’t know George was going with anyone when he met me oh sure you do don’t you remember Phoebe what’s her name her family Cook was an old friend of mine she was always bragging about
How no girl could get Mr be away from Phoebe George never mentioned a girl named Phoebe to oh well naturally not after he met you but one night when he was talking in his sleep it sounded to me like he mentioned a girl’s name Phoebe my secretary is 62 years old no
Harry you have to go over there and get everything straightened out with Rita yes and tell the truth yes I suppose it’s the thing to do but the only thing admit that Susan is pretty I’ll do it yeah so she’s young and pretty what’s the harm in being
Young and pretty I’ll do it okay and we’ll go over with you and back you up it’s the only way to build a beautiful marriage Harry keep everything open and above board she’ll admire you for it I’ll do it if I once start lying I’ll
Never be able to stop I’m going to get this marriage back on an even kill Harold we’re going over to the no’s house will you answer the phone if it rings okay come on Missy hurry up baby oh forget it go On Rita darling don’t forget Harry tell the truth and nothing but the truth I know it’s the only way oh hello Dorothy Hazel Mrs N your husband’s got something he wants to tell you I’ll bet darling about that neglige I’m going to tell you precisely what happened it
Ain’t as bad as it seems you know it ain’t even bad at all when I was in Europe a few months ago I let my secretary and her girlfriend use my apartment her own was being redecorated somehow or other she left her negl in my dresser it was all perfectly
Innocent well especially when you consider that my secretary is 62 years old I didn’t know that well never thought it was necessary to mention it well she’s been with the firm for years and years and years and Years she knows how valuable she is to us in fact she knows more about what’s going on in the office than any of us last year on her birthday when she was 72 all fell the office chipped in 72 I thought you just said she was 62 well you know how ladies are
Sometimes they shave a few years off 72 is the correct figure though I feel very ungallant it’s Hazel will you stop punching Me D dad what is this son I saw your car drive up just as the phone ring it’s your office they want to talk to you about something real important oh all right uh come along with me oh uh Harold uh son will you ask Mr n
To come over to the house tell him I want to see him okay what on Earth is the matter the three of you were staring at that front door as though you expected a tornado to hit it’s hit oh hello oh hi Harold dad just got
Home from work he wants Mr n to come over to the house right away all right I’ll K him m n you got any smelling sauce I’d go get it only we got our hands full 72 years old Harry I don’t care what kind of a jam you’re in at home I
Want that pre-trial testimony in the Wilson Hamilton case you told your wife I was 72 years old well not you I said my secretary was I got to let you go and find a 72-year-old secretary you can’t do that Mr null it ain’t her fault you’d
Fire me to back up a lie you told your wife I have to if a man has no Integrity he has nothing when I tell a lie I stick to it Mr Baxter I’m warning you if he fires me on grounds like that every secretary
In that office will walk out now wait a minute they will they’ll put whatever they’re doing and walk right out the door well well he’s not firing you I have to George I have to have a 72-year-old secretary if I go every secretary will go with me well someone
Please tell me who started this mess anyway I just hope I never see another trash can again as long as I live I know what his secretary looks like there there’s a picture of her in his album the two of them in bathing suits oh re
Well preserved for 72 isn’t she I hope I look that young when I’m that age if he wanted to hide anything he should have hidden this album no no Rita I I know his secretary I know her very well she’s a really lovely girl I don’t doubt it
That’s not what I’m mad about why did he have to tell me she’s 72 years old oh he wanted to tell you the truth he tried to tell you the truth he just couldn’t get up the nerve now that’s what I’m mad about he’s acting as though I’m some kind of
Greeneyed shrewish jealous monster it’s a reflection on me Harry will you quit in I want that pre-trial testimony judge CA is waiting for it now get going I’m going I’m going you introduce your secretary to your wife I will and let the chips fall where they may I’ll be right back with the
Testimony and the chips George we left them kissing and making up oh sure everything going to be peachy reading you all along Susan was was young and pretty she saw your picture in Harry’s photograph album now all he has to do is explain the other 20 girls in the
Album well I’ve checked all the testimony now get this over to judge Cy as soon as you can oh yes sir bye Mrs back goodbye and after all George Rita had asked Hazel to help them make their marriage as successful as ours has been
So I talk some sense into them yep I got them all figured out I’m just going to drench that house with love I’m going to give them everything I can think of so they’ll be as happy as you and Missy George yes who’s Phoebe who’s who Phoebe well I don’t know any Phoebe
Hazel said you were going with a girl named Phoebe when you met me oh her you never even mentioned her to me well there’s no reason why I should was there a reason why you shouldn’t of course not why well George Baxter one night when you were mumbling in your [Applause] Sleep Hazel never mind the house next door start covering this house with light and love Hey Missy I won I won the bowling tournament ain’t that something well what’s the matter Mr B you sick or something it’s your something my back is out again oh can I do something for you yes you can keep your fingers crossed oh
Is that the best I can do for you oh boy if it only hadn’t happen right in the middle of the playground dedication just as I was being photographed by the television camera well if you hadn’t tried to turn over such a big shovel full of dirt George
Now once and for all I want to set the record straight it wasn’t the shovel full of dirt that caused my back to go out it wasn’t no was feeling just fine until I straightened up that’s when I screamed you really screamed well I you couldn’t help it the pain was terrific
But the news real cameraman was very understanding he said he could cut out that part of the film before they showed it on the newsreal broadcast are you sure that’s why I asked you to keep your fingers [Applause] Crossed what’s the matter with the Television he kept his word all right Mr be he cut out your scream Hazel is brought to you by By you’re his answering service oh well tell Freeman that hazelberg wants him to come over to the backer house right away it’s an emergency he what well how do you like that what’s the matter boy Freeman has closed up his shop and gone fishing he’s getting too independent if you ask
Me the first time I have an opportunity to see myself on television and look what happens this sounds like a good one hello is this Gilbert the TV Doctor yes Gilbert here who’s calling well I’m Hazel Burke and we got a doozy of a problem over here we want may I ask
Who referred you to me nobody I got your name out of the Yellow Pages well I’m no longer listed in the Pages you must have an old book goodbye hey wait a minute you do fix TV sets don’t you madam I’m an electronics diagnostician and I have all the clients
I can handle I don’t wish to be rude but you are interrupting my cocktail hour and so once more goodbye oh hold on say I ain’t phing just for myself you know this set belongs to Mr George Baxter I never heard of him well he just happens
To be a very important attorney in this town and he also serves on the mayor’s welcoming committee oh that George backer well what seems to be your problem well the picture’s all covered with zigzag lines and and the sound is so wobbly that we can’t make out what
They’re saying we want you to come over right away and fix it well I’m afraid that’s quite out of the question I never make house calls at night hello Mr Gilbert is Mr Baxter speaking uh yes Mr Baxter as I was saying I never make
House calls at night now if your set has not improved by Monday morning I suggest that you bring it to my office for a checkup and I will run it through a few tests okay okay so let’s forget about tonight I can understand that part but I’ve injured my back and it’s impossible
For me to bring my TV set to your office well now look if you if you can’t come here tomorrow just say so and I’ll try to find someone else who can well I guess I can make an exception in this case just give me your address and I’ll be
There 1 2 3 Marshall Road thank you oh you understand Mr Baxter of course that the charge will be double rate for Sunday yes yes of course goodbye goodbye well I sure hope he gets that fixed so I can watch that golf tournament tomorrow yeah but what are we
Going to do tonight boy what do we ever do without Television with your back hurting so badly George you really shouldn’t have gotten up well you know I don’t like e in bed I always spill something mom dad would it be okay for me to set up a short way rig in my room I mean as soon
As I save up enough money to buy one oh I don’t know Harold um how much space would something like that that take up well not very much what do you think about it Dad h what do I think about what a short wave transmitted receiver
Bruce said he’d help me set it up Bruce who’s Bruce Bruce Camden Harold’s new friend the boy that just moved into the neighborhood oh the boy he was with last evening Bruce said he’d give me all the help I need so I can get my license to
Operate too well that’s very nice son but don’t you think you should wait until you’re a little older well he’s only two years older than I am and he’s been licensed as a h for nearly a year you know a short wave set can be very educational oh yes there’s no doubt
About that and besides even you and Mom can have a lot of fun with it and soak at Hands Hazel yeah it’s me sport how do you like it how do you like it Missy it’s stunning It’s A Wig you know well it certainly doesn’t look like a wig it does to me well there was so much going on about the TV last night I didn’t get a chance
To show you I brought it home from the bowling tournament I thought you said you won that wig looks more like the booby prize George how do you like it sport it sure does make you look different you see Mr be everybody likes it with you well I better get going it’s almost
10:00 tomorrow night in Bombay India oh boy this younger generation he’s rushing like mad to keep up with tomorrow in Bombay and I’m just trying to keep from falling behind with today here Bruce just got his equipment set up so I could go in the air again yesterday
Last night we called his friend ined Brazil well goodbye oh come right in Mr Baxter Mrs Baxter this is Gilbert the TV Doctor how do you do Mrs bter how do you do and how is our patient today well not much better I’m afraid my back is killing
Me oh that oh yeah well actually I was referring to your sick Telly tell me have the symptoms been about the same today well as a matter of fact we haven’t had it on today but now you see that’s exactly the way it acted last night I certainly hope you’re
Able to fix it before the golf tournament starts well let’s see what’s wrong with our little fell Shall They got to be you know a stethoscope is absolutely unsurpassed in diagnosing and locating hum I’m happy to report Mr Baxter that there are definitely no hums in your T there aren’t well that’s encouraging ain’t it Mr be no there’s one thing that ain’t wrong with it Huh you’re a very lucky man Mr Baxter this set is in perfect operating condition what do you mean perfect take a look at it I have I’ve checked everything power tube good vertical hole good horizontal hole good Transformers good tuning circuit Goods etc etc I can find absolutely nothing wrong with your set
Mr back what about the antenna did you check the wir maybe that’s what’s wrong with it Madam I checked the antenna before I came inside it is facing the proper direction and the lead in wire is excellent how you expect me to watch the golf tournament with a picture like that
Ah that won’t be easy Mr Baxter it is my professional opinion that your trouble is being caused by some outside disturbance therefore I’m afraid I cannot be of any further use to your set I’m sorry well good day Mrs Baxter what do you do you mean uh outside
Disturbances oh it could be one of any number of things that’s interfering with your reception such as uh X-ray equipment dimy faulty radio apparatus High powerered Machinery etc etc but Mr maxo at least you have one consolation there’s nothing wrong with your Telly it’s in tiptop condition oh my secretary
Will send you the bill good day oh it’s already started and it’s the one thing I really wanted to watch you want me to take a kick at it Mr be no turn it off turn the darn thing off George what about Harry n if he’s watching the
Tournament I’m sure he won’t mind if you and Hazel watch it with him now why didn’t I think of that why of course he’s probably oh whoever it is I’ll tell him to call back Mr B so you can call Mr n right away back to the resident
Oh hi Mr null Mr B was just going to call you to ask if him and me could come over and watch the golf tournament with you that is if you got it on what what would he say is it okay just a minute Mr no he’s calling to find
Out if he could come over here cuz he can’t get anything on his set either well Mr no we got the same trouble on uset I guess we’ll have to read about it tomorrow in the newspaper huh yeah bye Mr B something is rocking our reception
Are we going to take it laying down just I’m thinking let me see there are no medical officers here or a hospital or any high-powered Machinery squad cars now what would they have to do with it well they got short wave and the TV doctors Hazel wait a minute short wave
Hazel that is it Dorothy do you remember Harold saying that Bruce Cen just got his shortwave radio installed yesterday yesterday I guess so but and he was talking to Brazil last night right when I was trying to watch myself on the news well yes but and today he’s talking to
India now now right now right I think he’s got it Missy I know I’ve got it that’s that amateur short weight operator who’s interfering with our reception but George you can’t be positive Dorothy where are the camons live now George you’re jumping to conclusions you don’t have to come along
If you don’t want to Hazel will drive me down there well I’m certainly not going to meet the camons for the first time with a complaint don’t worry Dorothy after I explain the situation at Camden he’ll be as anxious as the rest of us to get this all cleared up come on Hazel here it is Mr B Mr Camden yes sir uh I’m George Baxter I live down the street oh yes young Harold’s father glad to meet you Mr B thank you and this is Hazel Burke how do you do you folks care to come inside no
No no not today thanks I uh I hurt my back and it’s a little difficult for me to move around hey Dad hi Hazel I don’t have to come home already do I well uh Bruce this is my dad and she’s Hazel hi hi did you come over to see the sh way
Set up we should be glad to show to him what R Bruce well uh not today son but uh I would like to talk about it Bruce can do that for our on Mr Baxter you don’t know what you’re letting yourself in for well uh Mr Cam and I certainly
Don’t like to greet a new neighbor with a complaint but we haven’t been able to get a decent picture on our television set since your boy began operating his shortwave equipment but Dad please Harold don’t interrupt I’m sorry about your TV Mr Baxter but you’re wrong if
You think my boy is causing your trouble well now Mr Camden I uh not an unreasonable man and I wouldn’t say these things unless I had my facts to back up my case but sir my equipment couldn’t be responsible for your trouble unless oh no we’re getting somewhere
Unless what unless your TV is an old model how old was it made before 1950 well I said it’s old but it’s a lot younger than that what has 1950 got to do with it short wave operation on the 10 meter band occasionally causes interference on sits built before that time
Oh well I uh I don’t know anything about that but I do know that I’m not the only person in the neighborhood with this problem Mr Baxter if my boy tells you he’s not causing your trouble you better believe him come on Bruce GE I’m sorry Bruce Harold get in the car GE Whiz where you going son to my room well what are you going to do up there I mean uh uh why don’t you stay down here with the rest of us there’s nothing to do down here maybe I’ll read a book or something Harold what’s the matter
Darling don’t you feel well I feel okay I guess George Baxter you got into a big argument with Mr Camden didn’t you I knew that would happen if you went over there oh it wasn’t a big argument at all Hazel come back here hey you tell her
Tell her what Mr B well tell her it wasn’t a big oh for a Pete’s sake Hazel I thought you were on my side well I was but I don’t want us to lose a good friend for Harold oh George oh Dorothy will you please calm down now Harold knows I only did
What I had to do we can’t go on indefinitely without television uh you understand that don’t you son I guess so if you’re really sure it’s Bruce’s fault of course I’m sure I’ll prove it to you right now well how can he do that now um Bruce had all his equipment
Turned off when we left his house right yes there you see all the troubles disappeared now come on everybody maybe we can sit down and watch what’s left of the golf tournament [Applause] is the television working tonight our favorite program is on and maybe if Bruce ain’t using a short wave we can get it turn it on if you’d like hazel hey look Mr be it’s working perfect uh where’s Harold doing his homework here Dar Bruce has got homework to do tonight too boy I think I’ll go up to the school and get his teachers to give him a lot more to do Haz Please Ruth just finished his homework Dad Dad somebody’s prowling around outside our house where are you sure I’ve been watching him for about 10 minutes first he was snooping around Mr n’s house now he’s in front of ours maybe I should go call the cops Mr be wait a minute George be
Careful I’ll get the wedge everybody George be careful is this the backer resident yes it is what do you want I’m from the power company we have a report that you’re getting interference in your television reception well yes we are but picked up a disturbance that began just
A few minutes ago that’s right it did come on in just a moment I want you to look at that television that interference is coming from the Camden house that happens every time their son operates that shortwave set Mr Camden’s the one that ask us to
Come over here well now just a minute I’ve G to considerable expense in this situation charge sir our company maintains a troubleshooting Department of this sort of thing it’s not not radio interference it’s electrical there’s nothing wrong with the wiring in this house Mis is’s your trouble well that’s that’s my heating
Pad I threw my back out last Saturday and I’ve been treating it with heat BDI thermostat what oh Mr B it just come to me you was using that heating pad on Saturday when you was trying to get the news and you was using it Sunday morning too when you tried to get the golf tournament and Hazel please now I can’t believe that a
Little thing like that could well it certainly wouldn’t interfere with our neighbors reception too would it oh yes malfunction in a thermostat can emit impulses that would disturb TV reception for some distance this heating pad could also cause a fire sir oh well Harold unplug it and throw it away sure
Dad well uh thank you very much you’re welcome good night nice son listen to me believe me this this was an honest mistake now everything indicated that Bruce was the well I know Dad I’ll put this in the trash where are you going upstairs and wash the egg off my
Face yeah that’s just what I’m going to do Mr be as soon as I see the end of this Program Hello darling did you have a good day how’s your back much better but I bought a new heating pad anyway well what was wrong with the hot water bottle I loaned you last night it Le I finally got so cold I had to wake up where’s Harold upstairs in his room
Harold would you please please come down here for a minute okay Dad what you got there Mr be well Hazel just something to take the taste of crow out of my mouth Hi D hi son how about you coming over to the canvas with me tonight before dinner
I have a little apologizing to do to Bruce and uh here’s a little gift here you can give him oh what is it well it’s a world clock oh and it will tell him the correct time in any part of the world for instance if it’s 6:00 here it’s 1:00 in
Hawaii I’ll get it hello hazel is Harold home well we was just talking about you speak of the devil come on in boy here’s your buddy that’s hi in Morse call I brought over my old Telegraph key and buzzer so you can practice but je thanks Bruce and
Here’s a present for you from my dad it’s a clock to keep beside your shirt short R red it tells what time it is in any place in the world like when it’s 6:00 here and you want to talk to your friend and a wife you know Ric que it’s
1:00 there Harold give him a chance to open it y Ain that something gee I don’t know what to say I’ve wanted one of these for a long time will you show me how to hook this up sure have you got a battery yeah it’s in my room come
On gee thanks a lot Mr B Master you’re welcome George that was a very lovely gift I’ll say how did you know it was exactly what Bruce wanted Mr be well his father told me Mr camp and I had lunch today and as soon as my back is well
We’re going to play golf Hazel he’s an amateur Champion you’re kind of a champ yourself Mr [Applause] be Oh hi Hazel hi hey I smell cookies yeah I thought you would I just baked them you heard of a Blood Hound well you’re a cookie Hound that’s oh no you spoil your dinner what no not until after you had your dessert a half a one no not a bite
You better wash up before Dinner So like I said was up for dinner Hazel Hazel is brought to you by I just can’t believe it well that’s true I can hardly believe it myself what in the world of the backst is going to do in the Middle East oh well you see Mr Griffin has a big oil deal going he wants Mr be to handle it for him I just
Can’t believe it how long will they be gone well I don’t know exactly but a couple of months at Least back the residance oh hi Gracie yep it’s true well the boxes left last night they ought to be in Baghdad tonight I just can’t believe it well I’m going to be staying with Mr be’s brother yeah I’ll call you just as soon as I get settled bye
Gracie well I locked the garage is there anything else I can do for you Hazel no I’m all said I’m just waiting for Harold to come down we’re going to miss you Hazel the Sunshine Girls just won’t seem the same oh for Pake Mur I ain’t leaving
The country as a matter of fact I’ve been wondering about that after all the years of service that you’ve given to Mr and Mrs bter I’m rather surprised that they’ve just tossed you aside like this don’t worry Rosie I could have gone if I wanted to but I I wanted to stay here
With Harold and that’s another thing why didn’t they take Harold with them well he couldn’t miss any of his school and he would have missed a whole semester hi Hazel hi hey Harry you’re supposed to be on duty what are you doing here I’m here representing the fellas from the hook
And ladder company the chief gave me special permission because you’ve done so much for us oh I ain’t done nothing ain’t done nothing you think we forgot the turkey you cooked for us last Christmas or the Checker tournament you set up for us or the way you coached our handball team to Victory
Hazel on behalf of the fellas at the firehouse and the chief I want to present you with this helmet making you an honorary member of hook and ladder company number nine oh thanks Harry I don’t know what to say except well thanks very much that’s okay Hazel it’s
Just that we’re really going to miss you I’m going to miss you too Hazel this has been the high spot on my route for 12 years oh thanks Bonnie I wish I could make you an honorary mailman that’s okay would you like my mailbag oh no Bonnie
They’d make you buy a new one yeah I guess so won’t it seem funny working for a stranger a stranger Mr Bee’s brother oh he’s like one of the family is he married oh yeah he’s got the sweetest wife Barbara and the cutest little girl hi everybody I’m all ready to go Hazel
Did you remember your toothbrush yeah good boy and a common brush yes and last night’s pajamas good boy can I hold the fireman’s hat I knew you were going to get it well I guess we’re all set I just can’t believe it oh Bonnie for Pake we
Ain’t going to the Moon I guess we better call your uncle Steve and tell them we’re on our Way honey what are you doing you don’t have to clean up Hazel’s coming I don’t want her to see the house looking like this I’ll get It hello oh hi Hazel I put some flowers in your room yes he is just a minute daddy Hazel wants to speak to you oh she probably wants to know what time I’m going to pick them up tell her late this afternoon I want to wash the
Windows hi Hazel are you getting packed huh Mr Baxter oh well we’re all packed we’re all ready to leave oh well I plan to pick you up later this afternoon oh no you don’t have to do that a friend of mine’s giving us a lift we’ll be there in about an hour
Bye U Hazel hello hello she’ll be here in an hour oh no oh SW I haven’t scrubbed the kitchen yet har and I’ll be able to play before lunch or clean the refrigerator now simmer down both of you Susie you go outside and play I want to talk with
Your mother a secret not exactly honey but it doesn’t concern you I’ll sure be glad when Harold gets here we’re going to have secrets and we’re never going to tell anybody Barbara Hazel’s coming not the Inspector General oh but she’s such a fabulous bar relax now look I’ve known
Hazel since I was a kid she’s a maid that’s all she’s just the best maid in the whole world now who who told you that well you did the last time we had dinner with George and Dorothy all right she’s a fantastic cooking housekeeper but that doesn’t mean you have to change
Your way of doing things honey it only means you’re going to have some help with this big old house okay that’s true all right Steve promise me you won’t change after Hazel gets here me change now why should I change well you remember what you said about George you said you’d never seen
Such a change in a man after Hazel started working for him he didn’t know how to handle Hazel I do how no I intend to be firm with her patient but very firm the minute she steps out of line I clamp down it may come as a shock to Hazel but she’ll
Adjust when she discovers who boss suppose hello oh hi Millie yes he’s right here hi Millie what’s cooking good morning Mr Baxter yes a man and his wife came in looking for a house to buy oh sure they’re right here I’m Mr and Mrs Robert Dunlap Robert Dunlap the millionaire the
Millionaire oh Millie you didn’t say that right out loud to him did you she did say it right out loud to him he walked out right he’s still there Millie I’ll be right over tell him to sit on and make themselves comfortable oh bless that Miler if I get away I’ll kill
Her you’re making fantastic time Hazel what was the record nobody ever tried for one before well we’re going to make it in No hi Milly hi Mr Baxter this is Mr and Mrs dlap I’m uh I’m sorry about that oh don’t be that’s one of the happier words in the language now exm millionaire there’s the sad one well I don’t think I have to be concerned for myself either
Way please sit down thank you well what can I do for you this morning well we’re looking for a house with a nice garden and room for a pool table and extra bedrooms in case the grandchildren decide to stay over you know we’ve seen our grandchildren for the first time in
2 years we’ve been living in Europe it was nice but it’ll never take the place of grandchildren do you have any listings in the Evergreen Heights area uh well as a matter of fact I have the houses are quite large in that section but I we
Know the area yes we raised our family there we loved it we should never have sold a place well how about it you want to show us what you have oh fine fine my car is right out front the houses are both empty so we can go right in oh
That’s a bad sign isn’t all market for a long time well uh a little while white elephants huh oh I wouldn’t say that it’s just that they’re quite large and expensive yes well we’ll take a look good I suppose I shouldn’t expect to buy a white elephant with
Peanuts don’t come in yet it’s not try lady you’re speaking to the greatest elephant salesman of all time they leave the worst tracks of anybody I uh may have sold the Bundy house you’re kidding nope Mr and Mrs Robert Dunlap seem to think it’s just what they want well come
In no great elephant salesman of the north what price are you been discussing for this rare white Packer 60,000 oh Steve the mission on that would be 3,000 bucks we’ll buy a piano wait a minute the dlps won’t make their decision until this afternoon uh and besides we don’t
Play the piano what give Susie lessons I wanted to play the piano all my life honey honey somewhere your logic breaks down if we get a hunk of cash like that it’s going right back into this house we manag to uh trade our way into it but we
Still have a be of a mortgage what’s that noise what is it Hi hi bar Uncle Steve hi Susie it’s h and Herold it sure is talk about making an Entrance Well I told her where is she she said she’d be in soon as she puts on her uniform okay now you you understand what we’re going to do we’re going to lay down the law we’ll establish right from the beginning just who boss and what we expect from him Yes
Dear you know I really have to laugh at George and the way he let her dominate him it’ll never happen here now look one more thing I want to establish here she comes well I just took a look in the refrigerator I didn’t have time to clean
It oh for Pete’s sake it looked perfect to me but I noticed you had some baked can I thought maybe you’d like some an omelet flunch oh oh that’d be fine uh did you get all settled Hazel yes pretty well I wondered if I could sto my uh scuba diving gear in the
Garage oh uh that’ll be all right well of course I’ll put my spear way up where the kids can’t get it good good uh is your room going to be all right Hazel oh perfect terrific I even got a gorgeous view of the garden who put in the
Delphiniums I did oh you put them on the wrong side of the house you know delphiniums need a lot of sun thank you he’s probably like Mr be don’t know anything about gardening I certainly do huh who pruned the Roses I did well you picked the
Wrong season to do it you should wait till the end of the dormant period I’ll remember next year well like I said to Mr be all the time when it came to handing out green thumbs the backers was all at the movies who who does your hair I do oh
You do a terrific job I’ll help you next time if you want me to like I did Missy oh I noticed there was a fresh bottle of vitamin pills over the sink who takes them oh Steve uh Mr Steve Mr Baxter is going to start taking them you
Got a condition what do you mean have I got a condition well I mean is that why you have to take the pills and do I have to watch your diet certainly not I’m just run down a little that’s all I now Hazel we we we asked you in the living
Room so we could establish some ground rules for our relationship oh that’s a good idea Mr be and I did that right after remarried missy good good yeah well of course Thursday’s in my day off and then I like enough time off on Sunday to go to church oh well that’s
Fine fine I was thinking more in terms of a daily schedule oh well breakfast is at 700 and I like everybody to be at the table on time cuz there ain’t nothing worse than a cold breakfast fine now for lunch well lunch is 12:15 on the dot and
That’ll give Susie and Harold time to get home from school you take your lunch home well sometimes I U my office is just in the next block so I what about customers well you have to give me at least a half an hour’s notice if you’re going to bring customers home to
Lunch dinner’s at 6:30 and you can have as many guests as you like cuz I like Snappy conversation while I’m serving what time do you have oh it’s uh 11:45 oh for Pete sake I’m slow I got to start lunch oh uh Mr Baxter if I think of any
More rules I’ll let you know well what do you think I think I know why George and Dorothy left the Country this omelette is delicious dad says Hazel’s the best cook in the whole world I wonder how he likes the food in Baghdad we’ll have to ask him when he calls tonight I brought you vitamin pills Mr baxon thank you Hazel Hazel this omelet is delicious how do you get
It to rise so oh well I just eat up the whites you know good and stiff and then I just ease in the yolks there’s your vitamin pill thank you Hazel you can just to wash them down with this water thank you very much it
Says on the label you should take two a day yes I’ll just uh take them out of the bottle for you Susie you ain’t drinking your milk I will Hazel now there’s your pills Mr Ste hael I am not a child I will take my pills
When I’m good and ready to take them now I would like a little more coffee please yes sir thank you I’ll get the pot that is the most infuriating woman that’s what Dad always Says not a word from anybody all gone all gone I like a little more coffee now please yeah what about you miss baxa no thank you [Applause] Hazel Ste that was a silly thing to do it’s a matter of principle I will not be pushed around by that woman but those vitamins are for your own health now what difference can it make if I start taking them tomorrow instead of today KZ we’ll find out Uncle Steve
Harold she can’t possibly find out now let’s change that subject all right yes sir the dlps when are they going to let you know about the house oh they said sometime oh they said sometime this afternoon I have to go back to the office as soon as I finish my coffee you
Know I really think this deal is going through I’m practically counting my commission 41 42 43 44 45 hi Millie any calls oh hi Mr Baxter yes Freddy Mills called he wants me to go to the movies with him tonight fine anyone else Harvey Pierce I wouldn’t go
Out with him if he were the last man on Earth then Don Peters called Milly Millie I’m glad you have a full social life but were there any calls for me not a thing Mr Baxter 942 943 so we called her in the living room and I U well I explained exactly what
Was expected of her meal schedules things like that as long as we keep a tight rain owner Hazel will work out fine I remember when you told me what my duties were on this job he look so serious boy I was scared I’ll bet Hazel
Was too well I didn’t mean to scare you or Hazel either but I do believe an employee should know exactly what’s expected of her oh sure otherwise a person won’t know what she can get away with that isn’t what I had in mind Milly backster realy who’s calling
Please just a moment it is it done left it’s Hazel he ask her what she wants could I take a message this is Millie Ballard I work here after school and on Saturdays nice meeting you too Hazel will you ask her what she wants please she wants to know what you want
She wants you to come home and take your vitamin pills what makes you think I uh I didn’t take them why do you think you didn’t take them counted the whole bottle she says it’s a new bottle and it’s still has exactly 1,000 pills in it
Oh I I won’t tolerate this tell her I forbid her to call me at the office hi Hazel he says he forbids you to call him at the office uh-huh mhm oh that was sneaky right back in the bottle please now Mr and Mrs Dunlap come in
Look we talked it over during lunch okay Hazel I’ll tell him Hazel says milie please don’t but Hazel says I don’t care what Hazel says I’m sorry Mr Dunlap you were saying well uh we like the house Steve the high ceilings remind me of our old place so
Roomy oh good good yeah the grounds are beautiful that uh Lawn isn’t that lovely a gorgeous lawn oh fantastic What a fine putting grain huh uh but say if you play golf there’s a course less than 15 minutes away it was finished about 6 months ago oh excuse me oh here are your
Votom and pills p sake you must be Millie would you mind getting him a glass of cold water sure Hazel glad to Hazel I’m in the middle of a business deal oh you must be the dlps I was hearing all about you at lunch and about the wonderful old house you’re buying in
Your old neighborhood uh well we were thinking about it but Steve you didn’t give me a chance to finish we have decided against it against it but you said that yes I know it’s a great house it’s a lovely house reminds me of our old house well
Then why here’s your water ha oh thanks Milly now come on take your pills not now go on and take them Mr baxon he’s got a condition take them Steve health comes first you see boy the house was a little too much money for you huh oh no but where would
We get servants in this day and age well if that ain’t a coincidence I’m the head of an organization called the Sunshine Girls and I could get you a cook and a housekeeper and nothing flat did you take them both yes I did you ain’t hiding one under your tongue no you know
Um come to think of it maybe you folks would be happier in an apartment house Hazel what are you say dear that’s what I’ve been thinking but we’ve never lived in an apartment house oh it’s terrific no long to worry about I’m being stabbed but we both like to Garden oh well you
Can always get flowers in a flower shop and another thing in an apartment house you’ll always have somebody to talk to sometimes the voice comes right through the walls but the best thing is that you never have relatives moving in on you what do you mean you don’t have enough
Room not even enough room for someone to spend the night well what would we do about the grandchildren at Christmas time or Thanksgiving for that matter oh we go out of our minds in an apartment house Hazel are you sure you could get us some help oh I guarantee it we could
Even have it written up in the deal couldn’t we Mr Baxter well I um okay Mr Dunlap okay Steve that was the smartest sales trick I ever heard but I give you credit the house is the right place For you know where we could put the spin it right over by the window Barbara we still have bills and a mortgage now thanks to Hazel we’ll be able to pay off a big hun of them both even a secondhand spin it would be nice I’ll check the
Papers well I put Harold to bed and I looked in on Susie she’s sleeping like a top I can’t understand why the folks call ain’t come through well there’s a time difference in Baghdad Hazel and they may have had some difficulty getting a line yeah I suppose so darling
What time is it almost 10: yeah that’s right shall we turn in I think so how about you Hazel oh no I think I’ll stay up for a little while okay good night good night night Hazel night [Applause] Have they called yet oh no no not yet are you going to stay up any later yes I think I’ll stay up for a little while SP well then I’m going to stay up too all right right come on and snuggle up here with [Applause] Me I think we’d better wake them up don’t you think it’s after 3: oh yes I think we’d better that’s you res oh oh yes operator yes I’ll hold on is it them yes it’s B dad hot dog oh hi Missy geez it’s so good to hear your
Voice again oh we’re all fine yeah how’s Mr be is he remembering to change his socks every day well give him my love fine well here’s Harold you better make it fast cuz we got to get everybody in in 3 minutes hi Mom how’s bad dad guess what
We came over in a fire engine
