TOPIC – How to Use FAILURE to GROW as a GK
– Failure = Growth Opportunities
– What does this Look Like?
– Why is this important?
– What is FAILURE in a GK training environment?
– Support Structure is Needed
– Expectations: Are they Set? By Whom?
AUDIENCE – Parents, GK Coaches, & GKs
UGKA COACHES
Andreas Papakostas (IL & AZ): Owner, Olympic Goalkeeper Academy. Everything GK Podcast Host. Owner, Olympic Soccer Academy. UGKA BOD Member. @olympicgkacademy
Michael Kappas (VA): Owner MKGK Academy. Goalkeeper Director, Virginia Rush. Former D1 College Coach. UGKA BOD Member. @mkgkacademy
Hello everybody Eric Eisen HUD here the United goalkeeping Alliance and welcome to tonight’s pre-educational session uh tonight we have Michael kappus and Andreas papacostas they will be our subject matter experts I’ll be facilitating the conversation um and as noted please please ask questions this
Is for you and um again this is I think one of the more under tapped pieces of information regarding failure so I’m very happy to put this on tonight Mr Michael kappus Mr Andreas papacostas welcome hey thanks for it’s good to have you here on this Tuesday night um quick
Introductions U Michael kappus is the owner of MK GK Academy in Virginia Beach Virginia he’s the goalkeeper director for Virginia Rush former division one college coach and a United goalkeeping Alliance board member Michael welcome thank you thank you Eric thank you for having having me excited excited to be
Here nice yes sir and also with us tonight is Andreas papacostas he is the owner of Olympic goalkeeping he is has his excuse me everything GK podcast he’s the host of that and he is the owner of Olympic Soccer Academy as well as being united goalkeeping Alliance board member
Andreas welcome sir awesome glad to be here I’m excited to get going and help parents and goalkeepers with this topic awesome guys and I’m Eric guysen Hut I’ll be facilitating tonight’s conversation with Michael and Andreas guys let’s get at it here uh we speak to
Failure and we speak to being safe in a failing situation we like to reward this as failure equals a growth opportunity um Michael Andreas let’s start with you Michael if I could what’s this look like what does that mean um actually you know what before I
Say anything I’d like to open it up I want to see what everybody else thinks first I don’t want to I don’t I don’t W to I don’t want to give the answer yet I want to see what uh the crowd what what are our members here are thinking uh
What what do they think what does failure look like what does it look like I like Jack continue everybody to use that raising of the hand button that works really well and helps me as a facilitator thank you Jack Jack go right ahead please um what I think it means
What I think it looks like it kind of looks like never you like Miss like a stop that could be easily saved or make a mistake like with passing passing to like the wrong team okay okay are there others out there what’s in the chat function here I’m going to
Take a peek real quickly if I may oh good night guys hello others who else who else let me hear it there are a couple UGK coaches on this call we could always pick on too with Richard be one of them no but go ahead and ask for Richard Mr Richard what’ you
Think when parent typed in learning opportunities hey guys good night um can everybody hear me yes sir perfectly um I think for me it’s um using the word failure is like when uh a player make a mistake and you can’t really see the recovery from them like
When it breaks them um that is the only thing but I always say like really learning from your mistakes it’s not really a failure it’s just basically about learning from it and adjusting how do you make that adjustment so um since I’m doing goalkeeping I never really try
To use the word failure because a goalkeeper make a bad pass or the uh would say a simple goal some people might say is a simple goal but it just that calculation wasn’t correct so um I just thinking it’s just being down when you see a goalkeeper really down from
Making a mistake is not a failure but really just being down on theirself being hard knowing that they could have done better was just my point of view of it no I love it I love it that’s a great one actually Richard and I and I want to actually kind of
Like say the same thing like you know being a goalkeeper myself and being a goalkeeper coach all these years that is like one word we don’t like to use as failure right it’s always it’s always something for us to learn uh the the mistake is you know it’s a mistake and
You learn you learn from it and then you move on so I I agree with you on that 100% so for me personally just to kind of answer uh Eric’s question uh what does it look like uh for me it’s not it’s not a failure but it’s an
Opportunity to learn from my mistakes that’s what it looks like for me Andreas I like you to add to that please so it look like w I can go in so many different directions uh because first of all I think the word failure should not exist when we’re dealing with youth
Sports but it it does have a meaning towards that that in most is really the the what we feel the opinions of others are and I think that’s that’s where that that that that terminology kicks in you know we’re talking about negative emotions when you’re dealing with failure and you know
Um to me failure is feedback failure is is feedback right and the only time you actually can say that you failed is by not accomplishing your end in mind and I think I saw one of the comments something about quitting I forgot who put it on there Heather not
Trying again okay yeah when you decide that you allowed the emotions the feeling the opinions the errors and the mistakes to be bigger than your reason to develop get better learn and grow um than you know Others May label that as that but failure is is is is
It’s feedback you know you can have feedback from whatever if you feel that’s fail but I want to replace that word failure and just say errors and mistakes that’s basically it um and it could be magnified in front of others okay um or um you can quickly resolve by
Focusing on what can change in order for that to lesson uh the next time it presents itself whether it’s in practice in training in a game or or whatever like it like Michael why is why is that important especially you not using the word failure at the youth levels because we’re still
Learning uh because in the youth levels is it’s a learning environment uh we don’t you know we don’t uh you know because we fa not not fa but because we didn’t do something right it doesn’t mean that is over that is done uh it’s we always we’re constant learning it’s a
It’s a learning environment and to me that is the most important thing again when I make the mistake how do I learn from it and how do I move on from from that mistake and not to not to make it again and if it does happen again okay
Then then I have to look in a little bit more in depth and figure out like okay what is the reasons that the mistake is happening over and over again but it’s to me it’s uh in the Youth Level it’s all about uh learning so never ever
There is a failure in the youth levels yeah Andreas your comments regarding feedback um I mean all come failure all comes down to who’s providing that feedback and and how it’s delivered can you would you agree with that uh 100% you know I’ll I’ll I’ll answer that I’ll just also pigtailing
Off of coach kappus is Youth Sports is supposed to be about development that’s what youth sports are right you’re it’s it’s all it’s supposed to be about development and development is all about making mistakes and learning from them that’s in every sport right sometimes we’re in the position obviously in the
Goalkeeping position sometimes we’re the last line of defense the last line of a result and we carry a lot of that burden and a lot of people will actually put attention to that but but the goalkeeping position the toughest moments is actually what teaches the goalkeepers the most but I’ll tell
You I I’ll tell you only if parents and coaches can offer them that freedom to fail I think that’s very important is if the atmosphere if the culture stemming from the coach or and or the goalkeeping coach and the parent okay is not conducive to allowing the errors and and the
Mistakes um the goalkeeper will have a hard time in processing and moving forward right so it’s very important that we talk about teaching moments we talk about developing we talk about correcting we talk about moving on not quitting all these great things right but is the goalkeeper in the correct
Atmosphere with the proper support structure which includes parents and Al obviously the coaches are they in the correct atmosphere for for the process of moving forward changing correcting adapting learning to have to take place and I think that’s very important what describe what you just said I want
You to put that into Andreas a goalkeeper training environment’s that look like well I’ll tell you what my goalkeeping training environment um I think I may have shared this in the past is I it’s very important to connect the field players and the coaches and the two things that I pretty
Much I’m a big stickler at especially for the goalkeepers is having a meeting and understanding that the communication of the goalkeeper is required so the field players have to pay attention to the communication of the goalkeeper if obviously the goalkeeper is saying things that doesn’t make sense it’s not
In line with communication then the coaches have to take care of that but it is the psychology and the blaming and the pointing of the figures of goalkeepers even if they made an error that was a goalkeeper error we’re never going to blame the goalkeeper we’re never just like we’re never going to
Blame the striker who’s right in front of the goal who misses an open net right because they’re you those are teaching moments right whether it’s a technical error a tactical error a speed error a decision making uh or indecisive whatever that is that happens for all
The players on the team and we have to treat the goalkeeper just like we would treat a field player and that is a requirement at least for my club um so that way the the off the bat in the season the goalkeeper can give themselves permission to make errors they have to
Give themselves permission but if they’re always going to be focusing on what my field player what my Defender what my coaches what the parents what the other team is going to say we need to change that so what does it look like in a training how do I communicate with
The goalkeepers when they do make an error asking questions what they can do instead of me telling them as a coach like what they should do because they probably hear it from the parents they probably hear it from the teammates hey great you made that error great here’s a
Great opportunity to to learn from it what would you change differently would it be a set position would it be that you would attack the ball would it be that your you know your stance was too what whatever again whatever that is do we know if the goalkeeper knows because
If they don’t know how are we supposed to be upset mad or even create another scenario for them to learn so they either they know and they they will have to fix it or they don’t know when we have to teach them to fix it right and
And that’s all part of our training curricul at least my training curriculum in every session every age every level nice Michael what still you look like in a goalkeeper training environment with you no I mean I I agree with that addess I mean a lot of our training sessions
That we do here is also the same thing a lot of q&as you know what I mean we we want our Keepers to to make mistakes so we can you know address them not like like I said like ad said too um not necessarily for me to tell them exactly
What the mistake was but to see if they realize what they did wrong uh and then you know as if it’s a big group of goalkeepers they they kind of Coach themselves they say hey you know what when you did this dive instead of taking your step sideways take the step forward
So a lot of times my keepers are correct the person that is actually in in uh you know in in the play which is the environment that I’ve created here in Virginia uh is you know and then if I need to step in to kind of correct
Something I will but I let my Keepers correct each other uh because it’s just something for them to again I feel like that feedback coming from the other Keepers uh it just it just comes out better so yeah so we’re okay we we support you know the mistake uh but then
Again we we address it and then we fix it it’s interesting I’m I’m looking at the comments and apparent in Florida says um negatively thinking in a dark mindset and and I’m thinking about how kids can get there and it truly comes down to not doing what you guys are
Talking about not effectively communicating to the kid hey here’s the Kid K the first thing when he does when he messes up chin the chest like hey hey it’s all right it’s a learning opportunity here’s what you should have what should You’ have done and then let
Them tell you and then kind of go through it but if that communication between coach and player can happen ever so smoothly with no tension that’s that’s ideal and and a lot of coaches I shouldn’t say that a lot there are coaches that don’t do that can I yeah
Can I expand on that um Andreas I think this I think this is so important for the parents who are listening here as well and some of the goalkeeper coaches that you know again may also be frustrated with some head coaches because I I truly believe this is this
Is having a safe atmosphere you know a goalkeeper keeper will put their head down or doubt themselves you know for two for two reasons you know my opinion maybe a lot of other reasons but they’re all made up differently with certain beliefs about how they feel about themselves how they feel about
Competition right but the reality is they don’t want to let somebody down whether it’s a team the coach or the mom or dad okay and they’re worried about what others are going to be saying right now because of that those are the two things and it can be easily fixed if it’s
Prevented in the first place and again the prevention comes from Mom and Dad right but it also comes from the head coach because here’s the deal and I I’m a very big proponent of this and I try to educate this as much as possible is um
If the coach right if the head coach is on the same side the players will be as well if the coach you know on the sideline does that bad body language right and they see a goal and they see this well what are the kids on the sidelines they’re looking at coach coach
Is upset coach didn’t like what happen and what happens the players don’t like what happened they’re like they’re just mimicking and modeling the coach so I I think from a very early age what we as goalkeeper coaches can do in our first goalkeeping session is actually have this conversation right
Talk about body language but one of the best things that you can do for goalkeepers to find those goalkeeper coaches that can mentor them and talk about selft talk because it’s all about how do you handle disappointments right how do you handle disappointments when there’s an error well the cell Talk
Plays a significant role giving yourself permission understanding that you’re going to making errors hey if a professional goalkeeper who’s making millions of dollars make errors I think you as a 12y old it’s okay to make errors as well right but it’s having those conversations meaningful conversations um and you know there’s no
Failure or or when everyone is involved in that it’s now just it’s just taking care of the reactions from those and again for some it’s going to take time for some it’ll click in after three or four sessions for some you know um I ju I just think the biggest I think the
Biggest hurdle is having the correct it’s hard to say because corre it’s really the correct parent support instead of telling the goalkeepers what they should have done right we all know what they should have done it’s it’s getting them to that it’s that it’s okay and this is what’s going to make you
Better if you don’t make these errors then how do you correct it and make it better right if you get an F in in school well you can go do nothing about it and take the test again and guess what next step is probably going to be
An F or here’s what we can do we can practice we can get you tutoring we can ask questions to the teacher we can do all that stuff we can study a little bit more we could do this we can do that and then if you get a
C that was progress and if you can get a c you can actually get an a right and it’s all just getting them to see what the next step can be and making sure that hey it’s a positive thing when you make an error at the Youth Level because
Now gives us an opportunity not only to correct it and fix it but strengthen it so then it becomes one of your strengths rather than a weakness well done well done and I think now it comes to um you know the you mentioned support system you mentioned
Some some roles when you were just talking Andreas and and one of the roles I was going to actually imple like put in there while you were talking was you know you said that they look at the coach and everyone kind of Acts how the coaches do same thing with parents
They’ll they’ll act how their parents act and I’ve seen that way too many times so the hardest job or the hardest position in Youth Sports is the youth goalkeeping parent it’s not easy guys it’s not easy because your kids are gonna mess up and you just got to sit there grinning bar
Like don’t thumbs up keep going but let’s go to let’s let talk about the support structure here Michael what um we talk if you could take the first two the GK coaches and the head coaches what would you say their roles are from a support system with um Youth
Goalkeeping and and when errors occur and growth opportunities occur well my me personally as a goalkeeper coach I think having that relationship with uh having that relationship with your goalkeepers right uh for them to understand that if they make a mistake they can come up they can come and talk
To you uh and not not fear you right uh and that’s one thing again here in Virginia like we do very well is that so if I I get to watch all my goalkeepers play and when they make it me sick they look over to me uh and they’re looking
For something right so I’m always positive with them like hey don’t worry about it shake it off we’ll discuss it after the game uh and then after the game we’ll talk about it hey what did you you know what did you see what did you you know what happened on that goal
What happened on that mistake we you whatever and they they we’ll talk about it you know what I mean and that’s it and then we move on uh there’s never any yelling from the sine like oh my God you should have had that you know oh you let
The ball go in the back of the net trust me they know that the ball went in the back of the net I don’t I don’t got to tell him that uh so it’s very it’s always it’s always been supportive uh with my goalkeepers and the biggest
Thing is again to have the trust for them to come to you and say hey what did I do wrong how can I fix it you know so to me you know that the trust between your goalkeepers and the goalkeeper coaches uh as far as the head coach goes
I feel like as a goalkeeper coach you should you should always have your goalkeepers backs you know what I mean and the head coach needs to understand that I’m not saying that the head coach cannot talk to the goalkeepers but I’m uh um I’m always very big uh you know
Especially in the club that that I coach here that uh if the head coach is going to talk to the goalkeeper like I like to be there I like to be present just to make sure that we avoid any kind of negative talks uh so but you know the
Education with our head coaches in this club is actually very very good because I do educate all of our head coaches about how to speak to the goalkeepers uh and again we know we’re not saying to be fake like oh my God it’s okay you know everybody makes mistakes but but you
Know it’s to be how how you can how can you you know give your feedback as a head coach to a keeper without being negative right can you be can you still give uh you know your negative quote unquote feedback but being in a positive manner so we do a
Lot of Education uh in the club with the head coaches on stuff like that so uh but again the biggest thing is the head coaches the the head coaches and the head coach they need to understand that as a goalkeeper coach you have your goalkeepers back you know so Andreas
What do you in your in your Academy do you have any communication policies not only down to the player but more specifically with this question between head coaches and goalkeeper coaches do they communicate a lot uh yes because I am the uh owner of the club and I’m also the goalkeeper
Director go back Andre I go back to Michael on that one so go ahead please go ahead yeah but it it it first of all we when we have a parent meeting we talk about this department and everybody knows that we are a goalkeeper development specialty
Club as well right so you know um I I think it’s I think it’s it’s it’s crucial it’s crucial especially in today’s game we request and we require so much of the goalkeepers but yet we’re not putting that there’s a lot of there’s probably people listening right now goalkeepers
And parents of goalkeepers listening right now that probably don’t get enough goalkeeping training right or they get somebody who who’s just the drill trainer but not really the complete educational trainer right and it’s not the goalkeeper’s fault and this is why I think how the the head coach um who
Listen we all know nobody understands the goalkeeper better than another goalkeeper period right and this is why I think being a part of the United goalkeeping Alliance I mean you’re you’re talking about a safe haven place where we understand at the same time you know Michael said something very
Important you don’t want to be fake and just say oh you know no you know you you want to motivate to increase increase the understanding the learning what is required okay obviously in in a way where you know they don’t get into that negative emotion um but don’t don’t just always say that
It’s hey at one point we do expect you to do this right it’s requirement for you to do this but let’s work on how to get you to do that okay that’s probably something you want to do you want to be consistent on those right low balls correct okay all
Right and who who can get better at that well anybody who wants to can get better at that but do they have the support structure to give them that and that’s that’s that’s that that’s the part that I guess when I hear from parents after
We do podcasts or or we do stuff like that and I get calls it’s it’s it’s yeah I agree with everything you guys are saying but we don’t have anybody to implement that right so so what so what do you what do you do and that’s again
Where the ug comes in you do have a coach here could be it’s virtual right but you do have somebody that can coach mentor and guide you um or maybe you’re not getting it over there but the communication of what is required and expected of the head
Coaches what is expected of the parents gets addressed at the parents meeting and they also sign a a code of conduct um and there’s a paragraph in there that’s strictly about goalkeeping nice appreciate that I mean you just took GK coaches head coaches do you added in the GK Union you crushed it
Man thank you that was awesome I no right on Michael I want you to add to the um I’m a big big proponent of the GK Union um goalkeepers supporting other goalkeepers when I I always say it’s you know when you train with a group of gks
And you’re in the same club and then your your high schools play against each other nothing’s better than beating the goalkeeper that you’re really friendly with you know like that’s great I love that feeling and it’s that battle but you know you’re going to walk away and
See each other the next train and just be all everything’s great that support system just touch upon how how imperative important you think that is Al to to me to me it’s massive right uh especially if you talk about high school like uh I’ll go watch a high school game
And because I have two of my goalkeepers playing against each other but the best feeling afterwards is it doesn’t matter what the what the result was for whoever is like right after the game they go up to each other give them a hug high fives whatever and they’ll walk off the field
With nothing but smiles because they understand hey at the end of the day we might be you know opponents for 90 minutes but we friends you know we friends outside of all this so to me having having that you know and as as a coach to to see that with my goalkeepers
It’s amazing And like I said earlier too uh you know I I feel like you know we we support a lot of the goalkeeper Union as far as our goalkeepers within the club right uh we want to be we know we we want to be supportive we want to help
Each other out because we’re just trying to be better it’s not a comp competition I want to be better than you uh and I’m going to put you down is but I want to be better than you but at the same time I’m going to push you to get better so
You can push me to get better but the the one thing that that I also feel that we do very well you know talking about the goalkeeper Union is even outside the club uh I see a lot of my goalkeepers uh they’ll go up uh you know like we play
You know one of our you know rivalry clubs here in the area uh you know and the the the other team will lose my goalkeeper will go straight up to the other goalkeeper and give him a hug and say hey don’t worry about it you know
Keep your head up you know you had a good game it’s not not your fault so you know so it’s not only just within the club or you know it’s also seeing the goalkeepers going up to the other goalkeepers and you know and and and talking to them and giving them you know
Some kind of encouragement because they understand because we all at the end of the day we’re all in the same the same boat yeah Andrea said I thought earlier really well Michael when he said you know no one understands a goalkeeper better than another goalkeeper and and
To have that support even and when you’re oppositions but to have that that that continued support is just it’s Monumental it really is important for kids and their development in that safe place we’re going to hit on parents on the next slid I believe the next slide is expectations
So we’ll talk about that over there if you guys are cool with that I’m good can I share a Qui can I share a quick story yeah please yeah of course this all goes back to the G GK Union and what you just said that we share that you no one
Understands the goalkeeper better out a u5 goalkeeper who overheard on the sideline our opponent’s goalkeeper this was last year our opponent goal our opponent’s goalkeeper did not have their goalkeeper gloves with and the coach just tore into that goalkeeper okay I didn’t know what was happening and I saw my goalkeeper run
Over and gave a pair he had an extra gloves he gave him a pair pair of gloves and um and uh nrip ones they were the non-rip ones were the and you know what he said to me after the game he goes coach do you remember when I came to practice and um
I forgot my gloves and you didn’t rip on me like that guy did but you said hey now here’s an opportunity to work on your intrinsic muscles right and you’re just going to train without without the gloves right and we’ll do something positive out of negative he’s like I didn’t like how I
Felt when I didn’t have my gloves even though you made me feel good he goes I didn’t like that and I think he he didn’t like how that keeper felt because he knows how it felt and that’s why he did that right and here it is you’re competing against somebody but he
Understood what the goalkeeper was going through they gave they gave me tears afterwards and and that’s what that’s what that’s what that’s what goalkeeper Union and a safe haven and understanding and an abundance mentality truly means that kid made a difference we’ll probably never forget it for the rest of
His life and yeah he did the right thing we wind up winning the game you know I’m sure if we lost parents would say well why would you do that why why why not like we didn’t lose the game because that other team was wearing goalkeeper
Love we lost a game because we if that was the truth so again just wanted to share that because again no no Goen understands a a serious goalkeeper uh better than another serious goalkeeper let’s put it that way and to be honest with you Andreas that
Coach couldn’t have done a worse job of getting that kid ready to play a game that that kid doesn’t have his gloves his hands he doesn’t have he’s all questioning he’s he’s anxiety driven and now the coach is yelling at him in his like I talk about you know he’s just
Going to fail like he’s being set up to fail in that situation well he doesn’t want to let any people out and then now he’s worried about what other people are saying that that’s the worst emotional state you want to put any player at any youth sport yeah 100 per. 100 perc all
Right let’s get into expectations and and the reason I wanted to push parents over to this one is because here’s where I think parents can help their goalkeepers in regards to helping their youth stick to the expectations that are being set up front um and I think they
Can play a big role in that I I truly do so I think the support system from a parent really kind of helps with the expectations that are set but let’s get to the expectations being set up front why is that important Andreas and what are we talking about when we’re talking
About expectations what ises that ref ref what is that in reference to excuse me well expectations from others like it goes back to what I do at least for my club is that I I expect a certain behavior and understanding right uh when a goalkeeper makes an error right and
And that comes not just from the parents from the sidelines but it also comes from the coaches it actually starts from the highest level whatever that is the technical director the doc whatever you want to label the hierarchy of the club it has to not just be on paper it has to
Be executed and understood and agreed by everyone because that’s how the players are going to adapt to it so um the expectation from others it’s it’s really you need to do that from the beginning of the season so we can educate our our our goalkeepers right but when a
Defender turns around say something that they’re you know probably not supposed to say or a parent say something they know that okay I know coaches you know but they’re still kids they’re still taking in the words that are being used right so can we prevent all of it no we
Can’t can we decrease the chances yes we can if we expect it and we abide by them um for 12 years 13 years that I’ve owned my club um I’ve had to kick two parents out in 12 years that’s not bad right and it was really about how they talked to
Their own kid and I said listen what you do outside of practice and I I can’t control what you do but that doesn’t help my player your son play in a team atmosphere when you say the things that you say which affects my team other kids are listening to it and
Now they’re fearful so I have to remove you from that so when other parents see that you follow through with what you put down on paper kids now know that when you set out an expectation the chances that they’re going to do it is a lot higher than if
You don’t set the example through your actions as well and and I think that’s I think that’s very important that head coaches and goke keeper try as much as they can to provide that in a preventative fashion through meetings writings workshops uh talks in in practices maybe it’s so much as hey
After practice make sure you give an extra high five to your goalkeeper just do it Michael what’s what’s the parents role in that um I mean so listen the the Ro to me especially being a goalkeeper is you got to be positive with your kid right we talk about most kids quit
Sports for the car ride home right after the game because before the game everybody’s all happy high five sayy we’re going to do great but now we go to the game we lose 5- Z how is that car ride looking home right so we talk about
What I think what was the number area like 66% of kids youth kids quit Sports because of the car ride home y so you know we you know as parents sometimes times I feel like you know because I’m I’m a parent as well and and both of my
Kids play you know play in different sports not goalkeeping uh but again it’s we got to be supportive we have to you know at the end of the day I I always tell myself like those kids are probably beating themselves up worse than we can
Ever do so a lot of times just being a little bit supportive and um not sometimes don’t even talk on the car ride home just just let it be and let them I’m I guarantee you five 10 minutes into the car ride if you don’t say a
Single word they’re G to start talking to you hey Mom hey Dad what did you think you know what what what could have done differently what and and then you can give him your your opinion without having to beat him down because I promise you they’re probably beating
Themselves up already so to me so to me you know as a parent uh you know a lot of times yes are we competitive of course that’s that’s our nature we always want to we always want our kids to win but we also have to understand
That in any sport there’s going to be a winner and there’s going to be a loser there’s nothing there’s nothing you can do about it but how do we handle the moment that our kid has lost that game right especially a goke keeper if it was
A goalkeeper’s fault right how how do we handle that as parents when everybody when the entire Seline turns around and looks at us you know uh do we feel embarrassed do we whatever but we don’t take it out on our kid and I’m I say
That all the time and again at the club where I coach here that’s the expectation from the even from the coaches you know we have parent meetings we talk about it not just for the goalkeepers but for the field players we talk about it you know we even have
Policies about you know sideline behavior and you know car rides home what you should tell how what you should tell your kid but at the same time just like adrea said I’m not on the car right home with them so I don’t know what said
I don’t know what’s said at the house uh I can only control you know what I can control but you know I think as parents we just have to be mindful of that like Hey listen like you know and then try not to live through our kids because of
Whatever we didn’t we weren’t able to accomplish now we’re leaving that to our kid or you know what I’m paying x amount of thousand of dollars a year I expect you to do this that’s that that’s a big big mistake that we that we do you know yeah
No you’re right you’re right what so that the statistic was um when kids were pulled when they quit Sports what were the reasons um 50 to 60% I think it fell in that that Cate that percentage that high percentage Yeah was the number one reason why kids kit quit Sports I think
It was like over half of the supplies were because of the car ride home um we talked about expectations we we spoke we didn’t really get into the particulars of them um we didn’t get into the the chronological order and when they’re Revisited um do you guys have a plan for
That and if you could can you explain it when you re uh give me more details yeah in regards to like the expectations do you do it at a specific like is the beginning of the year when you set these do you have a and then you revisit every
Couple months throughout your season and then what are those types of expectations I know everything everything isn’t game related we speak a lot right we’re speaking a lot tonight about games and failure in games but what about expectations for training what about expectations for team training goalkeeper training um I I know
Some clubs that require you when you’re training shirts are always tucked in socks are always up like always like that’s a that’s a dress policy so the expectation has to be communicated what when do you see that what are they when they’re Vis Revisited excuse me how
Often do you revisit them during the year and then what how strict are you with your expectations what do you what communicate so for us our expectation oh no go ahead so for us our expectations are addressed in the beginning of the Season uh when we have our very first
Team meeting very first schkeeper meeting what the expectations are um so the biggest one for me is when we come to training we have to have our equipment right uh because I’m very big about you practice like you play so you play like you practice um so yes so we have have to
Have we as a club we have training uniforms so everybody’s expected to wear the training uniform we have to look like a team you know we talk about hey I want to go play in college I want to be a professional soccer player whatever well in college they wear uniforms to
Train in pro teams they wear uniforms to train so why are you not wearing your uniform to train here you know what I mean while you’re showing up with you know whatever like like you should wear your uniform so yeah so about for us expectations I say in the beginning of
The season um we don’t really like go that don’t have like a specific like okay three months from now you got to do it again but if I feel like there’s something not getting done or I feel like there’s a crack somewhere or something was misunderstood I will have
Another team meeting if need to be or another goalkeeper meeting to be like hey you know what I know we talked about this back in you know the beginning of the season but I’m I’m seeing a little bit of lack on this or that or that
Let’s fix it so we don’t have a specific every so often you have to have the meeting it’s more kind of like do you need to have the meetings you need to have you know go back through the policies so that’s how we Noe I appreciate that Michael Andreas anything
That you’d want to add or that you guys do differently uh very similar after the uh parent meeting and they sign everything they agree we then have a a a goalkeeper meeting strictly with the parents and the goalkeepers the expectations what is required of them but I also answer why you know you
Talked about the uniforms and the tucked in whatever policies and it’s not for us right it’s to teach them a routine teach them something that they have to prepare and think just like they have to do in in goalkeeping right um and then we just if it’s something that needs to be
Addressed like like coach Michael says uh when I do my player evaluations right after the first season if there’s something that I’d like to see something stronger within the expectation piece it will be put into that um evaluation player evaluation goalkeeper evaluation at the end of the first
Season nice well said well said all right moving on I want to um and parents if you have any questions or any comments great qu comment excuse me in the um comments section by Scarlet expectations are expectations that you want to expect from others can be feedback because we need that to get
Better yep said well said all right Andreas would you um care to elaborate on the this mindset principles and philosophies for Success please yeah I I’m on the phone so I oh I guess I can’t expand it okay yeah I’m on the phone so I could see it now okay so yeah
It’s just something that I put together I have a lot of my goalkeepers tape this on their wall I even have college goalkeepers that actually have this on their wall there’s certain principles and philosophies regardless of what type of training you get how often you get it
If you’re serious about this it it’s just a a just certain phrases that I think are Universal that will help you keep your eye on the prize and whatever that prize is for you I like to say keep having the end in mind whether that end is to play at the
Collegiate level whether that end is to to to go from the B team to The A Team whether it is to go from a local League to MLS next or ecnl whatever that end in mind is there’s just certain um Universal princi principles over the course of 20 plus years that I’ve been
Doing it that I think if you read everybody would agree to and again we talked about your selft talk right your selft talk is basically what your belief is what you say to yourself good or bad is actually true you are correct whatever you say to yourself good or bad
Is true and I think whatever you focus on good or bad expands right so today even happened I trained a a a goalkeeper GO train a goalkeeper who’s preparing for pro trials came all the way from Kansas to in this cold 15 degree weather to train and um you know
He was getting mad because he wasn’t getting to the ball quick enough and this guy’s a high level high level goalkeeper um and um and I just said one thing I said I just I just want to emphasize this how you take it is going to be up to you negative emotions will
Not help you with positive outcomes I’m going to say that one more time negative emotions is not going to help you with any positive outcomes he immediately just this is a 26 year old he immediately just let himself go and realized it he relaxed
Boy did he kill it and so I bring that example only because these are things that if if things aren’t going well one or two of these things that you read may help you snack back into focusing on your end in mind and that’s why I I created this several several years
Ago love it love it anyone have any questions on on this um and this is located by the way for anyone who wants this this is located on our resource tab in on the UGK website so under our resources tab this is there you can download this if you’d like to to take
It for yourself we can put a hundred of them up there it’s just I just selected you know again 20 21 I think or something like that would um Michael Andreas would you like to address this slide wow I mean there one of the greatest golfers right there
Right that’s correct it’s okay to fail felling does not shape your personality what does that mean I mean I can give the answer but I feel like we need we haven’t heard from anybody else from the group yet I would like to hear somebody what they think about this first
Anybody or you can type it in the in the uh you can type it in the uh in the group chat if you want I’m gonna ask Jack Butler what he thinks ah there’s his hand right there on Q Jack um perfect timing what I mean what I think it means it’s like
It’s okay to make mistakes it’s because you are able to learn from each mistake that you make which makes um like your training and your personality better each time I like it Jack I like that one that was good anybody else no no in the chat functions showing how
You accept failing will show your personality and I like that your true colors come out when you fail right correct well saiding doesn’t also failing doesn’t not shape your personality as far as like because I did something wrong it doesn’t mean that I’m I’m I’m a horrible person right so we
Can’t think about we can’t think about it like that either as far as like oh I made a mistake now I’m the I’m the worst person out there no because again mistakes happen we learn from them when we move on so that’s what Tiger’s trying to say right here is like because you
Made a mistake doesn’t mean that you a failure in life mistakes happen we learn from them and we move on Ali lupal do you have your hand up yeah uh can you hear me perfectly yes okay um I think that mistakes do not Define the person that you are I think
It’s how you respond to the mistake that defines you you’re getting you’re getting the official golf clap of appreciation Ally that was that was spot on thank you Ally you just summarized it you just summarized it perfectly nice other other comments other questions quick tip from Michael from
Andreas I’m putting them under the they don’t know this question’s coming um what little tricks do you have in your personal training environments that helps ease stress around failure do you do anything does your setting reflect anything are there things that you say or do do you because
I’ve got my a couple tricks that I do to help ease the tension of just the environment or the setting but I’m always looking to learn from mothers example and I’ll give you one of mine I always have music playing at my training sessions two two things one
It’s extra noise so they have to speak louder um two it’s just just kind of get your groove going you know everyone just have some fun with some music it just helps with background noise um helps the dead monotony of it but it allows kids too to
Like just relax kind of goof every once in a while but you know it’s there to Just Kill The Noise because otherwise they’re in their own head you know I try I try and help them with that and make it an easier setting yeah I don’t know
If I have anything specific I just it depends on the group that I’m training I might crack a joke or something like that before the training session starts just to kind of get some laughs out of them uh but I can’t I can’t really think about I mean me specifically having something
Specific um no Andreas so here’s what I do Andreas does about the Greek and then yeah I do a Greek dance no I I give high fives I immediately stop if it’s a if it’s a an eror where I feel the emotion and the reaction causes
Them to not focus on the next I stop it immediately I run up and I give him high fives I look at him in the eye or her in the eye right because automatically they’re get they’re going against what their emotion is you don’t give high fives when you have a negative emotion
What did I say negative emotions do not create positive outcomes so I will say that I’ll give a h five I’ll look at them and I’ll say that negative emotions will not create positive outcomes I know what you I know that you know you could do better and
Guess what you’ll just do it on the next one I go back and I just reset over again so high five is to the point where my goalkeepers are giving high five oh yeah yeah yeah so they try to make something positive yeah it’s really bizarre because now the union takes over
Right because they see me do it then they wind up doing it now it’s part of the curriculum so to speak you know so yeah that’s just what I do you know and great I love it and Scarlet in the um comments section has in my goalkeeping practices she’s a goalkeeper or
Scarlett’s goalkeeper um they stretch before the practice starts almost like a g GK Union type of environment where they kind of get together they have foam rollers and we get together as a group stretching it’s good Unity it’s a good way to kind of just get get rolling yeah absolutely absolutely fantastic guys
Here is the contact information for Michael kappus and Andreas papacostas um I I can’t uh speak highly enough about both of them um these guys are fantastic at what they do and they’re better people so if you guys ever have questions comments anything like this is
What we’re here for so please like this is our world get in touch with us follow us on Instagram and and anytime you need support please please reach out coach Michael if I could start with you for final words final words um yeah um what do we
Always say be a goldfish right you make a mistake forget about it move on uh learn from it and then move on that’s it fair enough love it Andreas I just uh again the people that don’t know or don’t matter what they say about you doesn’t have to
Be your reality it just doesn’t right you can allow it to be but it doesn’t but I just want to do a shout out to you Eric this is such a very needed educational something that you put together gosh with the educational and the stuff that we have here at the
United goalkeeping Alliance everybody is lucky to have this you know people talk about doing something like this right but the reality is having the the type of coaches we have on board to just educate and just speak freely like I don’t have any bullet points Michael doesn’t have any bullet points right we
We go off a format but to be able to speak from experience and be able to just to just share our passion our love our Solutions and our guidance H you’re not going to find that anywhere so I I applaud you for for what you’ve done for
These Keepers and the parents and I’m just glad to be a part of it so thank you thank yeah absolutely man that was I appreciate those kind words man it um if you if you love what you do you’ll never work a day in your life and and I told
My kids that just the other day I I was getting fired up for for the UGK session on Sunday night they’re like Dad man you got to work it’s it’s Sunday night it’s like 6 6:30 I’m like yeah man this is like like this what I do I loved it and
I I I think that it’s our world and I say this to people a lot man so help us help us help you you know as Tom Cruz said in in his movie there so I’m I’m a big component of it I’m a big believer
In we as a GK Union are bigger and better compared to our individual silos and hopefully this is just one example so again Michael Andreas thank you for your time tonight everyone have an awesome Holidays happy holidays to you be safe be merry and we’ll see you in
2024 happy holiday happy holidays kill it out there keep happy holidays thank you guys happy holidays all right bye thank you
